Mother's Day
by TheFirstMrsHummel
Summary: At the beginning of senior year, a strange woman shows up looking for David Karofsky.  Kurt helps her find him, and finds out something about Dave's past along the way.
1. Chapter 1

_**I don't really think they'd ever do anything like this regarding Dave's mom on the show, but this little plot bunny bit me and I just couldn't let it go. **_

As soon as Kurt set sights on the woman in the hallway, he had a feeling she wasn't from around these parts. It wasn't just the lost look on her face as she glanced at the faces of the students who passed her, though that was a clue for sure. Her wardrobe was another; Kurt knew his designers, and he ticked off their names as he took in her chic ensemble: Seven skinny jeans in a dark wash, a brightly printed Missoni silk blouse, and a crazy adorable pair of silver Prada sandals with faux jewels. She stood with a posture that suggested that she might be a model or a dancer; chin high, shoulders back and ribcage lifted. Her hair fell well below her shoulders in a shining fall, and her makeup was applied expertly. The last time Kurt remembered seeing anyone who looked like her was when he had been in New York City for Nationals. Everything about the woman radiated sophistication and savoir-faire.

Kurt approached her, and she smiled questioningly as he approached her. "Excuse me," he said. "I hope I'm not being rude, but you seem a little disoriented. Can I help you find something? The office, maybe?" From across the hall Kurt would have put the woman in her late twenties or maybe very early thirties, but now that he was close he could see she was older than that. There were some very fine lines at the corner of her hazel eyes that suggested she might even be as old as forty.

Her smile grew bigger. "Oh God, you're not being rude at all," she said. "Thanks for taking pity on me, I have no idea where I'm going. I'm looking for a person, though, not a place."

"A teacher?" Kurt asked.

The woman looked down, losing her smile. But then she looked back up at him, and it was back in place. "Actually, no. I'm looking for a student. I know it's a big school, and it's probably a long shot that you know him, but you don't happen to know David Karofsky, do you?"

Kurt's eyes widened. What would someone like her want with Dave, of all people? Getting over the surprise, he replied. "I do, in fact. I'm not sure where he'd be, though. We only have one class together this semester, and it was first period." The woman's face fell in disappointment, and a thought occurred to Kurt. "I could text him, though. Ask him to meet us somewhere?"

She brightened. "Oh, that would be wonderful! You're friends with David, then?"

Kurt paused. "Well no, not friends, exactly."

"But you have his cell number?" the woman said, clearly confused.

"He, uh…" Kurt paused, thinking of how to phrase his response. "He helped me out with some bullying problems I was having last year. Part of a task force kind of thing. He gave me his cell number in case there was an emergency."

The woman got a strange look on her face. Happy, but also…proud? "Really?" she said. "David was part of an anti-bullying task force?"

Kurt nodded, wondering again just who in the hell this woman was, and how she knew Dave. "So, when I text him, who should I say I'm with?" he asked.

She looked down again. When she looked back at Kurt the smile was once again in place, but this time Kurt could tell it was somewhat forced. "I was hoping for it to be a surprise for him, actually," she said. "We're family, but I haven't seen him in a really long time. Would you mind maybe just asking him to meet you? Then I can come out for the big surprise."

There was something really odd about the whole situation, but Kurt's curiosity kept him from refusing. "Sure, I could do that," he said. "By the way, my name is Kurt. Kurt Hummel." He held out his hand.

The woman took it, and Kurt was relieved to see her smile warmly. "Sandra Girard. But you can call me Sandy, almost everyone does." She released his hand, smiling brightly. "It's nice to meet you, Kurt. I can't thank you enough for helping me with this."

Kurt shrugged, reaching for his phone. "Let's go to the choir room, and I'll text Dave. I only had study hall next period anyway, and if he gets the message, maybe he has a class he can blow off too."

Less than five minutes later, Dave felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket. Taking it out, he was shocked to see that the message was from Kurt Hummel. They'd barely seen each other since the whole prom debacle. The Bully Whips had been disbanded, Santana losing all interest after failing to win Prom Queen. Although Dave still did step in whenever he saw someone getting picked on; he just didn't have to wear a stupid satin jacket and beret doing it. Kurt hadn't been around much in the last few weeks of school anyway. It seemed like every moment he and the other glee kids weren't in class, they were in the choir room or the auditorium rehearsing for that big competition in New York City. Dave had heard through the grapevine upon their return that they had come in a respectable twelfth, and the week after that, school let out for the summer. They were currently a month into their senior year at McKinley, and the only contact Dave had had with Kurt so far was trying to not get caught gazing at him longingly in Social Studies class. Kurt had gotten a haircut over the summer, different than anything he'd ever sported before. It was extremely short on the sides but still long on top, and he often wore it spiked up a little. It made Kurt look older, and completely drop-dead sexy.

Fingers trembling a little, Dave thumbed the "View Message" icon. _Can you meet me in the choir room asap? I have something I need to show you._ Dave tried not to let his mind go into the gutter, but failed. Everything he could imagine Kurt showing him was totally X-rated and filthy, and he had to stop in the bathroom and splash cold water on his face so he didn't show up looking like a red-faced idiot. He made his way to the choir room, thoughts racing. Dave had spent weeks trying to figure out how to approach Kurt; he missed being able to walk close to him in the hallways or sit at the same lunch table, like he had those few brief but heavenly moments on protection duty. He wanted to talk to Kurt, and see the forgiveness and understanding in those beautiful eyes again. But now Kurt had made the first move, and Dave was scared and overjoyed in equal measures at the thought of meeting with him one-on-one again.

He realized he was nearly running, and breathing heavily as he reached the choir room. _Could you be any more pathetic_, he asked himself. _Pull it together, desperation is the least attractive thing ever. Play it cool, you know how to do that._ He stopped just outside the room, and tugged his letterman jacket into place. Plastering a casual smirk on his face, he entered the choir room with a shuffling sort of swagger. He saw Kurt standing by the piano, looking absolutely gorgeous, and almost faltered. He rallied, though. "'Sup, Hummel?" he asked, shrugging one shoulder carelessly. "You wanted me to show me something?"

A huge smile broke out on Kurt's face, and he clasped his hands together enthusiastically. He moved towards Dave. "I sure do," he said, voice high and a little breathy. "It's a surprise. I hope you're ready, Dave."

Even though he knew it couldn't be happening, Dave couldn't help his next thoughts. _He's so excited about whatever this is. He's never smiled at me like that before, not ever. Oh my God, is he going to kiss me?_ Dave felt his arms helplessly begin to reach for Kurt, but the smaller boy twirled to the side and gestured to the back of the room, which Dave hadn't even glanced at since entering. Dave looked, and felt every part of him freeze into ice.

Kurt knew within seconds that something had gone very wrong. Sandy was approaching Dave cautiously, like one would advance on a dog that seemed likely to bite. Dave was pale as Kurt had ever seen him, even more so than when he'd been afraid that Kurt would out him in Figgins's office. He looked completely shocked, and not at all in a good way.

"Hello, David," said Sandy, just the touch of a tremor in her voice. She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Surprise?"

Dave's face screwed up into an aggressive and hateful expression that Kurt recognized only too well. "What the _hell _are you doing here?" he said flatly.

"I came to see you. It's your last year before you go off to college. I thought maybe it would be a good time to…try and touch base again." Kurt could see the tears starting to form in her eyes. _Oh shit, would did I get myself in the middle of? _he thought.

Dave continued to speak in the same cold, inflectionless voice. "I don't want you here. I've told you over and over again, I don't want you near me."

"It's different this time, David," Sandy said, a tear slipping down her cheek. "I'm not just visiting. I left L.A., and I've moved back to Lima. I want to try to make things right with you, and I know that'll take time. I've come back for good, David. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"I think it means that you're too old and used up to be a working dancer in L.A. or New York anymore." Kurt sucked in a breath at Dave's icy words, and Sandy brought her hand to her mouth. Dave continued, harshly. "You can make yourself feel better by saying that you came back for me, but if you were still young and getting gigs regularly you wouldn't be within a hundred miles of Lima. You and I both know that."

Sandy looked down, and Kurt was horrified so see that Dave had plainly hit on something truthful in his accusation. She looked back up at Dave, eyes pleading and tears streaming down her face. "Please, David," she begged. "Please give me just one more chance. I've made some terrible mistakes, and I regret so much. Please give me a chance to make it up to you."

"No," said Dave coldly. "I don't want anything to do with you. I never have, and I never will. Now get out of my face, before I call the office and have you tossed out on your selfish, heartless ass."

Sandy gasped out a cry, then turned and ran from the room.

Kurt stood there silently, watching Dave's large hands clench and unclench into fists. Suddenly, the bigger boy whirled around, and Kurt fought the urge to cringe back. The moment he met Kurt's eyes, though, his face crumpled from anger into sadness. "How could you…" He swiped at his eyes. "How could you do that to me, Kurt?" Dave said, his voice breaking on the other boy's name.

Kurt felt pain and remorse radiate through him. "I didn't know," he said. "I didn't know it would hurt you. She said it was a surprise, and acted like you'd be happy to see her. I wouldn't have done it, if I knew it would turn out like this, I swear." He felt tears begin to sting his own eyes. He moved towards Dave, and put his hand on his shoulder. "Who is she, Dave?" he asked, even though he was pretty sure he knew.

Dave's face went red and he closed his eyes, tears spilling over them. It reminded Kurt so much of the day Dave had broken down in the hallway and apologized to him, and his heart broke all over again at the anguish in the bigger boy's face. He opened his eyes and looked at Kurt with sadness so deep in made Kurt's chest ache. "She's my mother," he said.

Even though he'd already guessed, Kurt bit back a gasp at Dave's words. "Oh God, Dave," he said. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't know." He felt the strongest compulsion to reach out with his arms and gather Dave into a hug, but didn't know how to breach the awkwardness of their shared history. Instead, he squeezed the hand still on Dave's shoulder as firmly as he could.

Dave sighed. "I believe you," he said. He reached up and put his hand over Kurt's on his shoulder, and squeezed it briefly before lifting it off. "Just…don't ever do that again, Kurt. You know now, okay? Don't ever, ever help her get near me again, no matter what she says." He stepped back from Kurt, holding his gaze seriously.

"I won't," said Kurt. Seeing that it looked like Dave really did believe him, he asked "Are you okay?"

Dave snorted. "Nope, not really. But I will be. I think I'm just gonna ditch for the rest of the day." He walked to the door of the choir room, then turned to look at Kurt once more. "See you in class tomorrow," he said, then exited the room.

"Yeah," said Kurt quietly, to the empty doorway. "See you then."

_**I could leave this as a one-shot, or I do have an idea for a couple of more chapters (where we'll learn more about the back story of Dave and his mom). What do you think? Should I keep going? Leave a review and let me know.**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**OMG, I am so surprised and delighted at the interest in this story so far! If you want more, who am I to argue?**_

_**I know I usually respond to all of my reviews, but this time the muse said, "No time for that! There's writing that needs doing!" She's such an ungrateful bitch, LOL. :D But I'm not, and I want to thank every single person who reviewed for encouraging me to continue on with this. 3 **_

The bell over the front door to Hummel Tire & Lube dinged loudly. Burt lifted his head out from under the hood of the Chevy Nova he was working on, looking around for either of his sons. Finn, currently changing the oil on a minivan, looked as busy and filthy as he did. But Kurt had apparently finished up on the transmission job Burt had assigned him that morning, and was washing his hands at the sink. "Hey Kurt," he shouted. "Can you get that? I'm elbow deep in this piece of crap."

Kurt turned and smiled. "Sure thing, Dad," he said, taking out the container of Burt's Bees Hand Salve that he kept stowed in the pocket of his overalls at all time. He hated using the rough soap needed to get the motor oil and other assorted ick off of his hands, but taking a moment to moisturize after using it helped keep his hands soft and smooth. He knew most of the students at McKinley would never imagine the kind of hard and dirty work Kurt had been putting in at his Dad's shop since he was about ten years old. Finn had just about shit a brick the first time he'd witnessed Kurt haul over two heavy tires at the same time, whip off and discard the old, dirty ones from the vehicle he was working on, and install the new ones - all in less than five minutes. Kurt didn't exactly love working at the shop, and had even been kind of a brat about it most of the time prior to Burt's heart attack (he hadn't murmured a word of complaint about pitching in since then, though). But you didn't have to like something to be good at it, and his dad had apparently passed down the mechanically-inclined Hummel genes to Kurt in a big way.

Kurt walked through the door to the reception area, rubbing the last of the cream into his hands as he did. He reached the desk and looked up to greet the customer in front of it. "Good morning. How can I help y-" he broke off, startled to see Sandy Girard standing there with a small, nervous smile.

"Hi, Kurt," she said quietly. "I hope it's not a problem, me coming to see you here at work."

"Why are you here?" Kurt said shortly. He knew there were two sides to every story, but he could still see Dave's betrayed expression from last week clearly, and he didn't appreciate being used and lied to by anyone. "If you think I'm going to help you trick Dave again, you've got another thing coming. I would have never done it the first time, if I'd known you were planning an ambush like that."

The smile fell from Sandy's face. "No, I'm not here for that," she said. "I just wanted to apologize, for putting you in that position. It wasn't fair. I was desperate to see David, but that's no excuse. Sometimes I just get an idea in my head and I just go for it, even if it's stupid and inconsiderate. Two things I'm sure David would assure you I'm an expert in being."

"How did you even find me?" Kurt asked.

"I drove by this place a couple of days ago, and saw the name on the sign. I figured there couldn't be too many Hummels in Lima, you know?" She shrugged. "If you weren't here, I was going to leave a note. But since you are, I was hoping you'd be willing to let me apologize to you in person." Kurt stood silently and folded his arms, raising an eyebrow to indicate that Sandy could continue. "I'm very sorry, Kurt. It doesn't matter that you're just a kid, and that you're not really David's friend. What I did was wrong, and I'm so sorry I roped you into my family's drama."

Sandy's face was completely sincere, and at least as sad as Dave's had been. Kurt felt himself start to soften, almost against his will. He sighed. "Okay, I accept your apology. Thanks for coming by to say it."

"Was he very mad at you?" Sandy asked. "I hope not. I know you said you're not close, but I'd hate to think I caused any unnecessary tension between the two of you."

Kurt almost snorted with laughter_. If she only had an idea how much tension there's been between Dave and I, long before she ever came back into the picture._ "He was more upset than mad. But I think its okay, since he seemed to get that I was clueless about who you were."

"He told you?" she responded, quietly.

"I had pretty much guessed from what you said to each other. But yes, he told me you were his mother."

"Did he explain anything else? About why we're...estranged?"

"No, and I didn't want to pry. It's none of my business, really, anyway."

"Well, I kind of made it your business. So it's only fair that you get the whole story. If you want it, that is."

Kurt wished he wasn't so curious, and tempted. But since that day, he couldn't stop thinking about Dave and his mother, and if their relationship (or lack of one) had contributed to Dave's anger management problems. Since coming back to McKinley last year and experiencing Dave outside of his bully persona, Kurt couldn't help but see the layers of pain and misery that had apparently been hidden under the violence and hateful words. Kurt knew a lot of it was Dave's inability to come to terms with his sexuality; but now it seemed like there might be a whole lot of other baggage there, that had nothing to do with his interest in boys. And there was something compelling about Sandy as well. Dave had mentioned her being a dancer, and she definitely exuded the charisma and allure of a professional performer.

Kurt chewed on his bottom lip, considering. "I can take my lunch break early, I guess," he said. "There's a picnic table out back, if you have time to do it now."

"Sure," Sandy responded. I'll meet you back there in ten minutes, okay? I'm going to run across the street to the McDonalds and get a coffee."

Kurt went back inside and told his dad he'd be out back taking lunch, and luckily, Burt was so engrossed in the car he was repairing that he didn't realize quite how early it was and question it. Kurt stopped by the mini-fridge in the office and took out his lunch; a chef's salad with a homemade balsamic vinaigrette, and an iced green tea. He also stripped off his overalls, revealing the green, orange and blue striped long sleeved tee and True Religion jeans. He walked out back and sat down at the picnic table, and shortly after, Sandy rounded the corner of the shop and settled herself across from him. She toyed with the lid of her coffee, but didn't take a sip.

"Nice shirt, by the way," she said. "Is there an H&M in Lima now?"

"Thanks," said Kurt. "And no, there's not. But I go to Columbus to shop at the Easton Town Center once a month or so. They've got some great stores there, so it's totally worth the drive down."

"I'll have to check it out. It shouldn't be too much of an adjustment; it takes forever to drive anywhere in L.A., so I'm used to spending a lot of time in the car." Their small talk petered out, and they sat quietly for a moment. Kurt took a bite of his salad, then popped the top open on the iced tea.

"My son hates me," Sandy said, suddenly.

Kurt swallowed his food. "Hate is a pretty strong word," he said.

"It's an accurate one. And he has every right to hate me. I've been a terrible mother." She laughed despondently. "Actually, that's not really true. I haven't been a mother to him at all." She took a deep breath. "Maybe it's best if I start from the beginning."

"My whole life, I never wanted to be anything but a dancer. I used to bop around in my high chair as a baby, and my parents always said I could dance before I could walk. They enrolled me in dance classes when I was three, and I never looked back. Of course, the dance schools here weren't exactly cutting edge, but as I got older I was able to talk my parents into taking me to classes and workshops out of town. I even got involved with the drama club and show choir, to make myself a more well-rounded performer."

Kurt stared. "You were in glee club?" he asked.

"Sure was. My voice wasn't a show-stopper, but I could handle the chorus parts pretty well, and even some solos if they were right for my limited range. And it wasn't long before I was doing all the choreography, even though I was only 16. I knew exactly what I was going to do when I graduated from high school. Go right into the Dance program at Columbia College in Chicago. I'd have preferred a school in New York, of course, but my parents were dead set against me going to college so far away. I had everything all set up, and couldn't wait to blow the dust from this hick town off of my pointe shoes. But then my financial aid fell through, and it was too late to apply for a scholarship. So I made plans to start in the second half of the year, and made sure that my loans were airtight this time. In the meantime, though, my parents told me I had to get a job. I was helping out at my old dance studio, but there weren't a lot of hours, and my folks were very much the "pull your own weight" sort. So I started working in the file room of my dad's accounting firm." She made a face. "God, if there was anything that convinced me I was on the right track, it was that. It was soul-sucking; alphabetizing tax returns and boxing up 401k statements." Sandy shuddered. "I couldn't wait to get out of there at the end of every day, and would run off to the studio to rehearse for hours, so I wouldn't lose my technique."

"One day I was trying to lift a pretty heavy box, and one of the junior accountants came in. He asked if I needed any help, and I accepted, gratefully. I was always worried that I was going to hurt myself moving those stupid boxes around, or do anything that might put off college any longer than necessary. He was a big guy, but not fat. Muscular, and really tall. He lifted the box up like it weighed about three pounds. I remember thinking he must have played football or something in high school or college, but I wouldn't have known because he was a lot older than me and we obviously didn't go to McKinley at the same time." Sandy paused, reflecting on the past. "I was never into jocks. In fact, I hardly dated at all, and when I did, it was always other theater and dance geeks. But there was just something about him…a kind of sweetness. He had an adorable smile, and when he asked me to eat lunch with him that day, I said yes. His name, as you've probably guessed, was Paul Karofsky."

Sandy paused to take a sip of her now cooled coffee. "It was so weird that we liked each other. We didn't have anything in common. He was ten years older than me, and when you're only nineteen that's a big difference. He was every bit the jock I expected him to be, and had never been to any kind of dance or theater performance. He liked the small-time Lima life, and was excited about climbing the ladder at my dad's firm. We were going in two completely different directions, and I never, ever made it a secret that I was leaving for Chicago in January. But when we were together, it was like all of our differences melted away. Paul was so funny, and charming, and he was always telling me how beautiful and special I was. He said it was okay that I was leaving, because just to have me for those few months was worth watching me walk away in the end. And we had amazing…physical chemistry." She eyed Kurt, as if gauging how subtle to be with someone his age. "I'd never felt that way about anyone before. It was intoxicating, and I was a stupid, reckless teenager. We took one too many chances, and in November, I found out I was pregnant."

Sandy looked away, and Kurt was surprised to see that even after all these years, the shame was still evident on her face. "One of my classmates got pregnant last year," Kurt said. "It was really, really hard on her. On the father too, I think."

"I didn't want to have the baby. I was ready to jump in the car and drive like a maniac to the first Planned Parenthood I could find. But I couldn't bring myself to not tell Paul about it, and as soon as I did, he begged me not to have an abortion. He said it was his baby too, and he wanted to see it brought into the world, even if we only gave it up for adoption. Legally, he couldn't make me do anything, but…" Sandy trailed off, tearing up. "I did love him. It wasn't an unselfish love, or an unconditional one. I still loved myself more than anything or anyone. But I did love him enough for it to break my heart when I thought about what it would do to him. So I agreed to have the baby, and put off college until the next Fall."

"But of course, my parents found out about it, and that's when it all spiraled out of control. They were dying for the chance to keep me in Lima, and the pressure started immediately. 'You have to keep the baby.' 'You have to get married.' 'You can always go back to school later.'" She slammed her hand down on the table, startling Kurt. "What the _fuck_ were they talking about? I was a dancer, and at nineteen was already trying to play catch up." She looked at Kurt's wide eyes and shook her head apologetically. "Sorry. I just…it still makes me so mad." She sighed. "I could have stood up to them, but then they dug their claws into Paul, and convinced him that he had to make me stay in Lima and get married. It was just pressure, pressure, pressure twenty-four seven, on top of being scared to death and completely hormonal. Most of my friends had gone off to college already, and I didn't have a single person on my side supporting me. So finally, I caved. I became a wife and a mother for the worst reason in the world; to just shut everyone else up."

Kurt couldn't help but sympathize with Sandy, even though he was pretty sure he knew how the story ended. The thought of being trapped in Lima, especially after having tasted New York, was enough to make his heart pound. He would die, just wither away and die if he wasn't able to get away and follow his passions. Kurt laid his hand on top of Sandy's; she looked up, and a tear fell to see such empathy in those soft green eyes of his.

She sniffled, and continued. "I thought that agreeing would make things better, but it only made it worse. Because it wasn't enough that I had given in. They wanted me to be _happy_ about it all. Frigging _ecstatic_. All I heard from my parents was how lucky I was to have a man who would make an honest woman of me, such a good provider who loved me so much. And how horrible and ungrateful I must be, to be moping around so sadly. And Paul was totally in denial. He was legitimately excited about the baby, and about getting married. It was what he'd always wanted, to settle down and have a happy little family with a white picket fence, and all that bullshit. He was so jazzed, he just couldn't conceive of how miserable I was. Everyone around me thought my life was heavenly, but I was in Hell, Kurt." She paused, as if gathering strength. "I think I would have killed myself, if it wasn't for the baby. I couldn't take both our lives, even as depressed as I was. So I just went through the motions, and everyone just said that it would all be worth it when I held my baby in my arms."

"But it wasn't," said Kurt, softly. It wasn't a question.

"Nope, not at all. Instead it was a whole other circle of Dante's Inferno. David was born, and I tried so, so hard to fall head over heels in love with him. To want to spend hours watching him sleep, and counting his toes, and doing all those things that mothers are supposed to do. He was cute, and he was such a good baby, too; not colicky or sickly. And I _did_ love him, just like I had loved Paul. I've been to a few shrinks over the years, and we pretty much figured out that I might have been able to stick it out if I'd been allowed to be sad. To mourn for everything I'd lost. But instead, it was more of the same. 'You have everything, Sandy! A loving husband, and a beautiful son. A sweet little starter house, and you don't even have to work, just stay home and take care of your darling little newborn. What's wrong with you?' I cried and cried until I didn't have any tears left. Paul thought it was just a touch of post-partum depression, and wanted me to go on medication. I didn't want pills, Kurt. I wanted a damn _time machine_, so I could go back and have never, ever taken Paul up on that lunch invitation."

"I know it sounds terrible, that I would wish my son unborn. But I couldn't help it. I was so depressed by that point, I was literally suicidal. I couldn't eat, I slept every chance I got, and I wished every day that a car would hit me or I'd fall down the stairs and break my neck. Anything, _anything_ to make the pain end. And then I saw on TV, about Susan Smith." At Kurt's blank look, she explained. "She was this young mother who tried to kill herself and her kids. Drove her car into a lake with everyone strapped in. She apparently changed he mind and escaped, but her children drowned."

"Holy shit," breathed Kurt.

"I know. And that's when I knew I had to leave. Because while everyone else around me was talking about what an evil monster she was, I would just look at the TV and think, _I totally undertstand why she did what she did. I absolutely get it_." When you start thinking things like that, it's most definitely time to cut and run, before you do something that's truly unforgivable. So one day, I asked my mother if she would take David for the day, so I could do some shopping for new clothes. I'd lost so much weight, the ones I had from before my pregnancy were way too big. But instead of going to the mall, I packed a bag and went to the bank. I took out every penny the ATM would let me, and then I bought a Greyhound bus ticket to Chicago."

"How did they know where you were?" asked Kurt. "As oblivious as they were, didn't they think you'd been abducted or something?"

"I left a note. Short, sweet, and to the point._ I'm leaving. Don't try to find me, because I'm not coming back. I failed all of you, as a daughter, a wife, and a mother. When David gets old enough, tell him how sorry I was that I couldn't be the mother he deserves_."

"When I got to Chicago, I got a cheap motel room and slept for almost a whole day. It was the last time I ever slept more than eight hours. There was too much catching up to do, too much of my new life to live. I got a job as a waitress, and was slowly able to get back to dance classes. I busted my ass to get back into shape, and within four months I'd been hired on to an experimental dance company. It paid almost nothing, but I didn't care. I didn't need anything that money could buy; I was dancing, and most of all, _feeling_ again for the first time in a year."

"Did you miss them?" asked Kurt.

"Honestly? Really, truly, honestly? No, I didn't." Seeing that Kurt wasn't particularly shocked, she went on. "I thought about them. I hoped that they were doing okay, and that I hadn't screwed up their lives completely. But did I ever wish that I was there, instead of Chicago? Or think about going back? Never, not even once."

"I moved up to a better known dance company, and the pay got better. I was able to quit my waitressing job and dance full time. I had friends, and I even started to think about dating again. But of course, I was still married to Paul. So about a year after I left, I got up the nerve to call him in Lima. I was surprised he even took the call, but at that point I think he needed it to be over as much as I did. He said he'd hire the lawyer and take care of all of it, he just needed an address to send the paperwork to. Before I hung up, I asked him how David was. He said 'You don't get to know that anymore,' and disconnected the call.

"So I got to have the life I always wanted, despite the giant painful detour of fail. I was a true gypsy, moving from city to city and chasing the gigs and my dreams. I had a fair amount of success over the years, especially in my mid-twenties. But the older I got, and the more distance I had, the more I started to wonder how things were going back in Lima, with my parents and my son. I started by sending Christmas cards and birthday cards. They didn't come back to me, but they weren't acknowledged either. After three years, I called my parents, but I had to leave a message and they never returned the call. I called Paul, and the same thing; left a message, but no call back. I wasn't hurt, but I did want them to know that I was trying. That I was willing to let them back in, if they wanted me. Finally, after about a year of calling once every month or so, Paul finally picked up when I started talking to the answering machine."

"What did he say?" asked Kurt.

"He said that my parents had asked him to tell me to stop calling them. They weren't interested in reconciling, and that I was as good as dead to them."

"Yikes."

"Totally. It stung, but I wasn't that surprised. The Paul said that while he wasn't particularly interested in being back in touch either, David was getting older and it was probably time for him to know more about me. So that when he was old enough, he could decide for himself if he wanted any kind of a relationship with me. He was almost five at that point, and had asked why he didn't have a mom like so many of his other friends. Paul had just told him that I was very mixed up about being a mommy. And that it was better that I had gone away, because I was sad all the time, and it would have made David sad all the time too." We agreed that we would start by me writing a letter, and enclosing a current picture. That seemed to go over pretty well with David, and Paul even helped him write back a couple of times. Finally I was allowed to call and talk to David, on his 6th birthday. When I heard his voice call me 'mommy' for the first time, I completely lost it. I was in Las Vegas, and was a featured showgirl in _Jubilee!_ at Bally's. My career was peaking, I was making great money, and I loved living in Vegas. But that moment? It was the first time I felt regret over what I'd done. Over what I'd left behind. I managed to keep it together, but I called in sick to the show that night and just stayed in bed, crying. I'd never called in sick before; I was Ms. 'The-Show-Must-Go-On' personified. I started to think about going back to Lima for a visit, and six months later, I was between gigs so I just did it."

"It didn't go well, I take it?" said Kurt.

"I just did a three day weekend. Came in Friday morning, flew out Sunday night. I even stayed at a hotel instead of Paul's house, because we didn't want David to get confused about how long I was staying. We kept reminding him how much time was left, so it wouldn't be too jarring when I had to leave. But what Paul and I were too naive to understand at the time, is that no matter how much you try to prepare a little boy for his mother to leave him all over again, it's not going to be anything but traumatic."

Unbeknownst to Sandy, Kurt knew all too well what she was talking about. He had been the same age when his mother had died, and no matter how many times his dad calmly explained to him that she wasn't coming back, he still expected her to. And threw temper tantrums and screamed, when his dad had to tell him again and again, that his mom couldn't tuck him in, or sing that song that Burt didn't know the words to. Kurt swallowed the lump in his throat.

"He totally freaked out when I had to leave," Sandy said, starting to cry in earnest this time. "He just kept screaming, 'Mommy, don't leave! Mommy, I want you to stay with Daddy and me!" Finally Paul just told me to go, and I took off for the airport like my ass was on fire. And that was the end of the visits, and the phone calls. If Paul even brought me up, Davis would throw a fit and scream, "No Mommy. I hate Mommy!" We thought maybe after some time had passed he'd get over it, but he never did."

Kurt handed Sandy a napkin from his lunch bag to wipe her eyes with. "Well, Dave _can_ be stubborn," he said, trying to lighten the mood a little.

Sandy gave a watery laugh. "He sure can." She paused to blow her nose, then tossed the crumpled napkin on the table. "I sent birthday and Christmas presents, but Paul said he wouldn't open them. I tried calling from time to time when he got a little older, like ten or so, but he would never take the call. Then when he was twelve, my mom died and I came back to take care of the legalities, even though I was asked not to attend the funeral. Paul and I decided to try one last time for a meeting, and this time David agreed. I was so happy, but I knew as soon as I saw his face he didn't want to have anything to do with me. He was just a boy; not even a teenager yet, but he was already so big. And he talked to me in this adult, serious voice that just killed me. No kid should sound that old, so filled with cold rage. He told me that he wanted me to stop sending things, to stop calling and trying to talk to him. He said that he hated me, and that he would never, ever forgive me for leaving him. He said he wished I would just die, so that I didn't keep coming back and upsetting him and his dad so much."

Kurt didn't know what to say. He knew that Dave had probably been scared, and distressed over losing his grandmother. _But to wish his own mother dead?_ Kurt reeled. _Well, she wished her son unborn, he thought. Which is worse? God, no wonder Dave's such a hot mess_.

"So that was the last time I tried to contact him. Five years ago. Paul keeps me in the loop, even sends me pictures. He may have failed me when I needed him way back when, but I couldn't ask for him to be more generous. Sometimes it makes me remember why I fell in love with him in the first place. He even sent me a movie clip of David dancing to Thriller, dressed up like a zombie. I cried for over an hour."

Kurt realized he'd been out here way past his one hour lunch break, but figured if his dad had desperately needed him, he'd have come looking. "So what made you come back for good?" he asked.

"David was right. I'm almost thirty-eight. In dance years I might as well be sixty. I've been trying over that last year to decide what to do with the rest of my life. I gave everything up for dancing, and now that the dancing's gone, I'm just…empty. I don't know if he'll ever forgive me. I don't know if he'll ever even be able to stand being in the same room with me. But I just felt like, if he ever could, I'd want to be right nearby. So I'm staying in Lima, but I'm done pushing. He knows where I am if he wants to see me. Otherwise, I'm just going to stay out of his face, like he told me to. But I'm done running away."

Kurt stood up, slowly. "I should probably get going. My dad will be looking for me," he said.

"Of course," said Sandy. "Thank you, Kurt. For letting me explain, and apologize. You're actually a pretty amazing, kid. Your dad ever tell you that?"

Kurt smiled. "Actually, he does. As does my stepmom, and my stepbrother."

Sandy smiled back. "I'm glad they realize how lucky they are to have you."

"Well, I'm pretty lucky too, I think," replied Kurt. He started walking back to the shop, then paused. "Hey, Sandy?" he called.

She turned, and in that moment, Kurt saw the resemblance between her and Dave quite clearly. The hazel eyes, the height, and the straight, almost regal nose. "I was thinking about going to Columbus on Saturday. Did I mention that there's a Burberry in the mall there?"

"No, you didn't."

"Well, I'm always up for a shopping partner. And you seem like you'd be a lot better at helping spot the best stuff than most of my friends. Would you like to go together? That way, you'll know how to get there in the future."

"Yes," said Dave's mother. "I would _love _to go shopping with you this weekend."

_**Soooo…now that you know the scoop on Dave's mom, what do you think? Should I keep going?**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**I am sorry I haven't been able to respond to all the reviews personally. There are just so many, and the muse is still haranguing me to write the story instead of review responses. But please know that I read and cherish all of them. I can't tell you how amazed I am that there's this much interest in my take on Dave's mom. I was hoping for maybe 15 reviews, tops!**_

_**I'm so jazzed that there or so many different opinions on Sandy, my OC. Dave is definitely a polarizing character in the fandom, and I kinda like it that his mom is the same way, LOL.**_

"This choreography sucks," said Santana.

Kurt would have liked to have written her off as just being bitchy; but he had to admit, Mr. Schuester's latest choreography was one of the worst ever. All the kids knew that he was having some sort of drama with Ms. Pillsbury, and it was obvious he'd thrown the dance moves together at the last minute. As much as he liked Mr. Schue, Kurt was beginning to get very frustrated with how he was always flying by the seat of his pants. In his opinion, their Nationals loss had a lot more to do with writing the songs the day before the competition, rather than Finn and Rachel kissing on stage. And to make things worse, one of the things their score sheets had revealed was that the judges thought the creativity and skill was sorely lacking in New Directions where dancing was concerned. Mr. Schue should be trying harder than ever on it, not blowing it off.

Maybe it was too much for him. The teaching, and the coaching Glee club, and his series of drama-filled relationships (Kurt had nearly died laughing when Lauren had whispered to him that Will's "Born This Way" t-shirt should have said _Man Whore_ instead of _Butt Chin_). Maybe he could use some help. But Mike Chang, while he could learn choreography, was stumped at trying to create it. When he danced solo, it was all improvisational and completely in the moment. And Brittany was an amazing dancer too, but she lacked the communication skills to break down what she saw in her head into anything that the other members could understand. He, Rachel and Blaine (who had transferred to McKinley for his Senior year) tried to help, but they were already pissing people off by taking the majority of the vocal solos so far this year. Their attempts to assist with the dancing were just seen as another attempt for the three divas to take over the whole club.

They couldn't afford to hire a professional choreographer, and Gaga knew that even if they did, it would probably turn out to be a disaster like last time. They needed someone who was good, but wouldn't be cruel or harshly judgmental. Kurt thought - and not for the first time - that he knew someone who would be perfect for the job. But he had promised Dave, and Kurt Hummel didn't break his promises lightly. He watched, with detached horror, while Finn, Puck and Mercedes attempted to grapevine across the room for eight counts and somehow wind up with their right foot free to transition to the next part. It was impossible, of course, but that was how Mr. Schuster had written it. The choreography was filled with similar problems, and Kurt felt like banging his head into the wall repeatedly. _Screw it_, he thought. _This is an emergency_. Drifting to the back of the room, he quickly texted Dave. _Can we meet at The Lima Bean after school? I have to ask you something. I promise She Who Will Not Be Named won't be there. _

He made his way over to Blaine. "I'm not going to be able to study after school after all," he said. "My dad needs some help at the shop. I'm sorry to skip out at the last minute like this." Blaine assured him that it was no problem, and Kurt thought guiltily about how much he was keeping from his boyfriend these days. Kurt was hanging out with Sandy at least once a week, and while Blaine knew about her (they had even all gone to dinner at Breadstix one night), he had no idea about her connection to Dave. They had played it as if Sandy had brought her car into Hummel Tire & Lube, and she and Kurt had struck up a vague friendship based on mutual interest while her vehicle was being serviced. But both Kurt and Sandy were sure that Dave would want as few people as possible to know she was his mother, so they kept it between the two of them.

Kurt ordered his usual medium drip and slid into a table at the very back to wait for Dave. It would have probably been better to do this somewhere more private, but Kurt wasn't sure how Dave would react to what he needed to ask him. While he wasn't scared of Dave anymore, he didn't relish the thought of Dave possibly going off on him, and bringing up scars that had only barely healed. He and Dave hadn't really spoken since that day in the choir room, though they nodded at each other in acknowledgement when they passed in the hallways. And once, when Kurt had been out sick, he had asked Dave if he could copy his Social Studies notes from the day before.

He saw Dave enter and scan the coffee shop for Kurt. When his eyes met Kurt's, the letterman clad boy smiled shyly. _He had an adorable smile_, Kurt remembered Sandy saying about her ex-husband. One that had apparently been passed down to their son. Kurt lifted his hand in a little wave, and Dave walked over and sat down in the chair opposite Kurt.

"Do you want something to drink?" asked Kurt.

"Nah, I'm good," Dave replied. "I had a Monster energy drink at lunch, and I think that taps out my caffeine fix for the day." He looked at Kurt with an expression he couldn't quite decipher. It was cautious, but hopeful at the same time. Kurt smelled the distinct scent of Axe body wash in Fever (Finn used the same kind and he recognized it immediately), as if Dave had showered right before meeting him. He wasn't sure if he was uncomfortable or flattered by that, but he was leaning towards flattered.

"So," said Dave. "What did you want to ask me?" Kurt noticed his tongue came out to lick at his lips nervously.

Kurt exhaled. "I think I need to tell you something first. Then I'll ask the question," he said. "But before I do, I want you to know that all of this is up to you. If it gets to be too much, or you feel like you need to leave, feel free. I promise I won't take it the wrong way." Dave looked totally confused, so Kurt decided to just spit it out. "I've been spending time with Sandy, over the last couple of months." Kurt immediately sensed Dave's fight-or-flight response, and held his hand up placatingly. "Please, just hear me out. I swear I'm not trying to screw you over. I'm just being honest, okay?"

Dave's eyes darted from side to side, but then rested on Kurt's outstretched hand. He sighed, and Kurt could feel the tension leave Dave's large body. "Okay," Dave agreed, tentatively.

"I just want to say up front, this is not an attempt to get you and your mom…" he drifted off at Dave's dark look, and corrected himself. "Your _mother_, to reconcile. I'm very well aware that you're not interested in that. She came by my dad's shop to apologize for that debacle in the choir room, and we got to talking. She and I have similar interests, like fashion and performing. I like hanging out with her," Kurt said.

"I'm sure the two of you have a blast together," said Dave, with biting sarcasm. "Two peas in a pod."

Kurt winced. "I'm not doing this to hurt you, Dave. You and I aren't even friends, really. I didn't see any reason why I shouldn't go shopping or have lunch with her, as long as I didn't try to involve you."

"There isn't one," said Dave. "It's none of my business what you do in your free time, Hummel." Dave sat back and folded his arms defensively, lips pressed tightly together. "Look, why are we even here?"

"The glee club needs help. Our dance numbers look like crap, and if we want to have a shot at Nationals - hell, even Regionals - we need some serious intervention."

"Let me guess. Sandy wants to come twirling in to the rescue?" Dave said, rolling his eyes.

"Actually, I haven't even spoken to her yet," said Kurt. Dave raised one of his inexplicably perfectly shaped eyebrows, looking surprised. "I wanted to run it by you first, and see if you'd be okay with it."

"Why are you even asking me? I'm not in your stupid glee club, and like you said, we're not exactly friends."

"We may not be friends, but that doesn't mean I don't care about your feelings. I thought I made that pretty clear last year, right before you apologized to me." Dave looked down, his cheeks flushing slightly at Kurt's mention of that day. Kurt continued quietly. "I know you're still scared, and ashamed of your sexuality. It's not hard to see or understand how badly it tears you up, Dave. Dave looked up at Kurt, his eyes slightly moist. "And now I understand that there's even more to your misery than just being in the closet. If Sandy agrees to help New Directions, she's going to be around school grounds. You might see or hear her, and I know that would upset you, especially if you didn't expect it. I don't want to make you feel worse than you already do. So _that's_ why I'm asking you, and why I won't do it unless you say it's okay."

Dave sniffed, and blinked the tears out of his eyes. "Right. Thank you, for that."

Kurt smiled softly and shrugged. "You're welcome." He paused. "So, can I ask her?"

Dave lowered his eyes and stared at the table, obviously needing to think about Kurt's request. Kurt sipped his coffee patiently, letting him have all the time he needed. He was quite surprised that Dave didn't shoot him down immediately as it was. After a few minutes, he heard Dave sigh, and saw him lift his head to meet Kurt's gaze. Dave licked his lips again before speaking, something Kurt was starting to realize was a nervous tic of the bigger boy. "This is really important to you, I guess?" Dave said.

"Yes." replied Kurt. "The dancing really is a crisis situation at this point. And for most of us, this is our last chance at Nationals. We came so close to making to the top ten last year."

"Twelfth," said Dave, and Kurt gawked at him. Dave smiled and tilted his head. "What? I saw the banner. It was all big and red. Kinda hard to miss."

Kurt laughed softly. "I guess it was. And twelfth, especially out of fifty of the best show choirs in the country, isn't anything to be ashamed of. Our first year, we made it to Regionals but lost. Then last year we won Regionals but lost Nationals. It would be awful to take a step backwards this year, especially since it's my last chance. If we could make top ten, or even win...I think it'd be one of the happiest moments of my life."

"It probably would be. When we won the championship game last year," Dave said, "It was definitely the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"I could tell," said Kurt. "You looked really happy that night.

Dave's eyes went wide. "You were there?" he asked, stunned.

"Yes, I came with my parents and Blaine, to watch Finn play."

Dave's thoughts were whirling in his head. That meant that Kurt had seen him run onto the field to join everyone for the halftime number. That meant Kurt had seen him...

"I was surprised that you were such a great dancer," Kurt said, as if he had read Dave's mind. "Finn said you were good at both singing and dancing, but I didn't really believe him until I saw it with my own eyes. Really, you were one of the best ones out there. And definitely the best one out of all the guys who weren't really in glee." _You must get that from Sandy_, he wanted to say, but held his tongue knowing Dave wouldn't want to hear it.

Dave could feel his cheeks turning red at Kurt's praise. "Ummmm, thanks," he muttered. Kurt had hated him back then, but he had still enjoyed watching Dave dance? The thought was melting his brain a little. _I can't believe I impressed Kurt Hummel_, Dave thought. _He really thinks I'm talented?_

"I know Finn really wanted you to join glee, but he said you wouldn't do it because it would hurt your popularity." Dave looked at Kurt, but then his eyes slid uneasily away. "Is that really why? Or was it because you weren't ready to apologize to me?"

"Both, kinda," said Dave, still looking away. It was sort of uncomfortable, having this conversation with Kurt. But at the same time, it felt good to sit with him and talk again, like they had when Dave was in the Bully Whips. The subject matter was a lot more personal than those chats had been, but that felt kind of good too. He was surprised to find that he wanted to tell Kurt the real reason he would never join glee, something he'd never told anyone. Dave took a deep breath, and looked at Kurt. He had the same gentle, kind expression that he'd had when Dave apologized to him, and before he knew it, his secret was spilling out. "But the biggest reason I wouldn't join is because I don't want to be anything like my mother. I don't want have anything in common with her, or do anything that she'd think was cool."

Kurt's jaw dropped. He started to say something - what, he wasn't really sure - but stopped. He just thought about what Dave had said, and he suddenly was filled with a sadness that was almost physically painful. He swallowed, feeling tears prick the corners of his eyes. "But if it wasn't for that, you would want to join?" Kurt said in a rough voice. "You'd like to be part of what we do in glee?"

The sudden longing in Dave's eyes wrenched at Kurt's heart. "Yeah, I would," said Dave quietly, almost whispering. "Sometimes I would watch you guys at assemblies, and it was so hard to make fun of you with the other guys. Because I didn't think it was stupid. I thought it looked like a lot of fun. And then, when Bieste made us join glee, I found out that I was right about that. And I understood why Hudson, and Wheels, and the other guys on the team put up with being ragged about glee by the rest of us. Because it feels so good, in those moments when everyone is cheering for you, that it's worth it. You know they'll call you a loser the next day, but remembering how awesome you felt gets you through, I bet."

"It does," said Kurt. He didn't dare say more, because he knew his voice would break if he did.

"But the whole Sandy thing?" Dave said, "Singing and dancing and being in glee, just like she was? I can't get past that. I can't. And it's just one more thing to hate her for, because she's ruined that for me too."

"Maybe..." said Kurt, trailing off apprehensively. He was fairly sure that Dave wouldn't appreciate his advice, but he had to try. "Maybe if you didn't hate her so much, you could let that go. Maybe you could work on...not hating her so much."

As expected, Dave became instantly defensive. He folded his arms tightly, and his eyebrows dipped down in an angry frown. "Yeah, I was waiting for you to work your way around to this," he said peevishly.

"What?" asked Kurt.

"What your whole point was all along, I bet. Asking Sandy to help with glee club. Meeting me here, and getting me to 'open up'," he said, making air quotes with his fingers. It's nothing more than a way to tell me I should forgive her. You're friends with her, and you know it would make her happy. And now she's got you lying, and trying to manipulate me. Just like her."

Kurt gasped. "How can you say that, Dave? I know we've got a lot of baggage, but I've never been anything but honest with you. I know you don't trust her, and believe me I understand why. But what have I _ever _done to make you think I'd be so sneaky and cruel?" Kurt realized that he was actually hurt by Dave's accusation.

"Why else would you suggest it?" Dave sneered.

"Because forgiving someone isn't just about making the other person feel better," Kurt explained. "Sometimes, it's not even about that at all. Hate is like poison, and when you have so much of it, and you hold it inside yourself for so long, it kills. It kills the good things about you, like hope, and joy. You can't feel those things, because there's no room for them. Not with the hate taking up all the space inside you." Dave's arms remained crossed, but some of the tension left his body, and Kurt hoped it was a sign that he was getting through to Dave. Kurt put his hands on the table, clasping them together lightly, and leaned forward. "I told you once, that when you were bullying me, I hated you. And I did."

Dave's face changed immediately from belligerent to guilty. "Kurt, I-" he started, but stopped when Kurt shook his head and shushed him.

"Just hear me out, okay?" Kurt said. "I had so much hate and fear inside me back then. It ruined everything. Nothing was fun anymore, or felt good. Even after I was away from you, I carried it with me. I told myself that you were a monster, and that I would never forgive you in a million years. Blaine and my family wanted to know why I still didn't seem very happy, even though I was at Dalton. It was because the hate was eating me up inside; and because I couldn't let it go, I wasn't able to move on to the next chapter of my life. But then Finn started talking about what was happening with you being forced to join glee, and that he felt like he was seeing a side of you he didn't think could have possibly existed. I didn't want to hear it, at first. But he was so earnest, and eventually I was able to really hear what he was saying. He told me about that hockey player saying that you were gay, and then throwing a slushie at you. And I couldn't help but feel bad, because despite everything you'd done, I knew how those words must have hurt you. It was funny, because right after I felt that little twinge of sympathy, I felt…I don't know, a little lighter. Like I'd been squeezed in a vise, and someone was finally loosening it a little. It made me think that maybe, if I was able to let go of all the hate and pain inside me, I might feel free again."

He stopped speaking for long enough that Dave realized he was done for the moment. Dave's arms unfolded, and he put his hands on the table too, drawing closer and unintentionally mirroring Kurt's body language. "You forgave me way back then?" he said, frankly astonished. "I mean, even though you didn't say it outright in the hallway, I could kind of tell that you had. But I thought that was because I apologized to you, for real."

"It didn't happen all at once," said Kurt. "It took time, and a lot of talking things out with my family, and Blaine. But yes, long before you apologized, I had forgiven you. And it allowed me to be open enough that I could start being making friends at my new school, instead of just going through the motions. And to finally have a real relationship with Blaine, once he got his head out of his butt long enough to see what was standing in front of him the whole time." He checked to see if Dave looked weirded out by him talking about his boyfriend, but Dave's face was oddly neutral. "Blaine and I had hit a rough patch, right before we finally got together romantically. He did and said some things that really hurt me. But because I had forgiven you, who had done much more terrible things, I was able to forgive him so easily. If I'd been holding on to my hatred for you, I might not have given him another chance. And I'd have missed out on something really great."

Tentatively, Kurt reached out with one of his hands, and set it gently on top of Dave's. He was surprised when the other boy didn't pull away, or look around to see who might be watching McKinley's same-gender 2011 Prom King and Queen practically holding hands in The Lima Bean. Instead, Dave was staring at their hands as if he just couldn't figure out what these things were on the ends of their arms. "Dave?" Kurt said, and the other boy looked up with a sort of dazed expression on his face. Kurt held his gaze until Dave came back from whatever la la land he'd been off in. "I know that what Sandy did was horrible, and much, much worse than anything you ever did to me. I'm not saying that it will be easy. But if it's something that can heal even a little bit of all the pain inside you, Dave, it'll be worth it."

"I can't let her back in my life," Dave said, feeling the tears come. He understood what Kurt was saying, and now believed that he was genuinely looking out for his best interests. But he didn't think Kurt, even with all the shit he'd been through, could possibly understand how deep his mother's abandonment cut him. How it was so much a part of what made him who he was, he couldn't see how he could ever let that go.

"But you don't have to, Dave," said Kurt. "If you can stop hating her, or forgive her, or move on…whatever words you want to use to describe it; it doesn't mean you have to see or talk to her if you don't want to. It's completely separate. That Amish community a few years ago, they forgave the guy that killed their children in cold blood while they were in school one day. But that doesn't mean they're going to be visiting him in prison, or sending him a birthday card."

Dave blinked. He'd never thought about it that way before. He'd always thought that forgiving his mother meant wanting to go to her house for dinner, or have him come to one of his games. He thought _letting go_ meant _letting her in_. But now here was Kurt, who had somehow managed to forgive all the verbal and physical abuse Dave had tortured him with, telling him it didn't mean the same thing at all. _And it makes sense, because he forgave me a long time ago, and it's not like he suddenly wanted to be my boyfr…buddy, or anything_. He thought about how Kurt had said that forgiving him had started with a tiny step. Maybe for once, he could be as brave as Kurt, and take one too.

He pulled reluctantly away from Kurt's warm hand. It was nice, but well…Kurt had a boyfriend. He didn't feel right, holding Kurt's hand and feeling like he had to pretend that it was nothing but friendly on his end. Not when Kurt had been so honest with him. "If you want Sandy to help you with glee, I think I'm okay with that," he said.

"Really?" said Kurt. He smiled the most beautiful smile Dave had ever seen, and Dave knew he'd made the right decision. Anything that made Kurt this happy, and look at him like that, had to be worth it. "Oh Dave, thank you so much. I can't even express how much this means to me. How much it'll mean to everyone in New Directions."

Dave wanted Kurt to just keep beaming at him like that…well, forever. But Dave needed to set some ground rules, if he was going to be able to actually go through with knowing that he and Sandy might be in the same building at the same time. "There's a few conditions, though," he said, and sure enough, Kurt's smile dimmed considerably.

"Of course," said Kurt briskly. "Whatever you need, Dave."

_I need __**you**_was the first thought that came to Dave's mind, though he managed to shake it off and re-focus. "First of all, I want at least a few hours' notice that she's going to be on campus. The day before would be even better. And I want to know exactly where and how long you're going to be rehearsing, so I can keep my distance."

Kurt nodded. "Absolutely," he agreed, earnestly.

"You don't tell her anything about me. Not how many times I raised my hand in Social Studies, what I wore to school…nothing. And I don't want her knowing where my locker is, or what kind of car I drive."

"Okay. And just so you know, I've been doing that anyway. I would have felt like I was betraying your trust, if I'd told her stuff about you. Sometimes she talks about you, but I mostly just listen."

"Good. Don't tell anyone she's my mother, or that we even know each other. Make sure she doesn't tell anyone either. And finally, I want you to promise me that if she pushes you for information, or to set up a meeting, or you catch her trying to see me somehow, you'll tell her she can't help anymore."

"Again, I'd do that anyway. I want her to help us, but if she betrays _my_ trust, I won't want her around either. I know you don't think highly of her; but regardless, you should know I won't put up with anyone using me." Dave chuckled quietly at Kurt's haughty expression. "Is that everything, Dave?" Kurt asked.

The other boy had been so agreeable, Dave was almost tempted to throw _break up with Blaine and date me instead_ out there. Or maybe just _let me touch your hair, at least once a day_. He grinned a little, thinking that Kurt was pretty much the most amazing person on the planet, if he could make Dave smile at anything having to do with his mother. "Yes," he said. "I think that about covers it."

"Well, I'm going to head over to Little Dancing Divas," referring to the small dance studio Sandy had opened in a tiny strip mall, "and ask her. It would be ironic after all this if she said no. But I don't think she will."

Dave shrugged. "Good luck with that," he said.

Kurt stood, looking down at Dave intently. "Thanks," he said. "Look, Dave, I don't know if this sounds weird or not, but…I'm proud of you. You are so much more than that faceless jock with a slushie that I thought you were a couple of years ago. The real person, that you are inside? I hope you can keep letting him out, even if it's just a little at a time. He's not so bad, you know?" Kurt patted Dave on the shoulder as he walked past him towards the door.

_I know_, thought Dave. _And I'm so glad you do now, too._

_**For me, the entire Kurtofsky ship is about redemption, and forgiveness. While writing this chapter, I was able to really expand on my own feelings about forgiveness, and giving grudges and negativity a big kick in the nads. I hope it didn't come off as too preachy. And that you'll leave more reviews, letting me know if I succeeded or not. **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Apologies in advance for the massive A/N. You can skip it if you want to.**_

_**Once again, I would like to thank everyone who took the time to review this story. It's obvious that this fic has touched on some very sensitive subject matter, and based on the reviews and PM's I've gotten, it seems like many of you have had life experiences that make this story especially relevant, or even painful. I would just like to say that while I have my own feelings about forgiveness, I don't hold it against anyone if they feel differently. I know there are a lot of people out there in the fandom who don't feel that Dave deserves to be forgiven, and while I can't understand it, I honestly respect their opinion. If my life had been different, I might have found Dave's actions unforgiveable as well. So I can understand if there are more than a few of you out there who don't think Dave should forgive Sandy, or ever let her back into his life. If you are one of those readers, I hope you know that nothing I've written is meant to negate your feelings. Both my mother and father had a parent abandon them at a very young age (my dad as an infant and my mom when she was four), and each of them had very different ways of dealing with that. So I think I'm in an unusual position where I can see both sides, having watched both of them struggle with whether or not to forgive, or allow a reconnection with their absent parent later in life.**_

_**The thing I've discovered about writing heavier stuff is that no matter what I intend when I write, it gets filtered through the reader, and each person will take something different from it, based on what they've been through. It's always amazing to me when someone writes to tell me that something I wrote at my kitchen table (after a glass or two of wine, usually) makes them reflect on their life, the choices that they and others have made, etc. I think it must be how Max must be feeling when people Tweet or post on his Facebook page that his portrayal of Dave has inspired them to come out. On the one hand, it's just fanfiction. But on the other hand, when I choose to write about controversial or painful things, I have a responsibility to acknowledge that what I write can possibly hurt or help people in their real lives. So I guess the point of this ramble is that I want everyone to know that I care, so much, if this or any of my other stories cause some sort of emotional upheaval for you. And for you guys to know that when I write about this stuff, I don't do so lightly at all. 3**_

Dave knew it was inevitable that he would see Sandy, once she started coming to McKinley on a regular basis. Kurt dutifully texted her comings and goings to him each time, so he knew that she was there two and sometimes three times a week. With those odds, there was no way he was going to be able to avoid her completely. He dreaded the thought of running into her unexpectedly, like in the parking lot or something. That was always one of the things he hated most about when Sandy tried to reconnect with him as a child. It was always out of nowhere, and he never had the chance to mentally prepare himself for it. So a card would come out of nowhere, or a call; and every time it was like being punched in the chest. He felt like he didn't have any control where his mother was concerned, and he despised feeling out of control. It was one of the reasons he had such a hard time coming to terms with being gay; he didn't want to be different, but no matter how hard he had tried, it wasn't anything that he could change.

He thought maybe that was why Kurt's approach at the coffee shop that day had worked so well with him. Kurt had let him have that control, the power to decide whether or not he was willing to have Sandy in such close proximity to him. Then again, Kurt knew better than anyone about the importance of feeling safe. Dave didn't want to, but after their long conversation, he kept seeing parallels between what he had done to Kurt, and what Sandy had done to him. He worried about running into Sandy in the hallways, rushing through them with his head down on the days she was at the school. How many times had Kurt had to do that with him? Trying to keep low, and hoping that Dave wouldn't pop up suddenly to throw him into a locker, or just creep him out in general?

Dave didn't fool himself that his behavior those last few weeks before Kurt transferred had been anything but completely messed up. He'd become obsessed with affecting the slender boy; stalking him coldly and finding satisfaction when Kurt's expressive eyes would fill with fear, anger, or anything that let Dave know he'd gotten to him. And that had all been about control. He didn't like how Kurt made him feel things he didn't want to. He wanted to know what it would be like to have Kurt kiss him willingly, instead of pushing him away. And he could spend over an hour wondering what Kurt looked like underneath all those button up oxford shirts and bow ties. So instead, Dave tried to take control back by making Kurt feel things against his will too. Dave had the power to make it a good day or a bad day for Kurt, and he'd become so twisted and confused that he'd reveled in that. After Kurt had left and his head had cleared a little, he'd been horrified to realize how disturbed and abnormal his thoughts had become. He was glad Kurt had left, because otherwise, he might have done something really, really bad. Something that Kurt _wouldn't_ be able to forgive him for.

Shortly after that, Dave started realizing that it wasn't just Kurt he was attracted to. Kurt had been the first boy; although whether it was because he was so damn beautiful, or because he was the only gay dude Dave knew, he wasn't sure. Probably a little of both. He'd fixated on Kurt, but once he was gone, he started to notice that some other guys in school kinda did it for him. Mostly Sam (really nice ass), Mike Chang (abs like woah) and Anthony (great smile). He also started looking at porn on the internet, but just pictures - and only of a single guy. He still wasn't comfortable enough with the whole gay thing to even _think_ about looking at two guys together. By the time Kurt came back, finding another guy hot was practically normal to Dave. So his appreciation of all the things that were gorgeous about Kurt (too many to name) no longer upset him, or made him feel like he was losing control.

Speaking of control, Dave had decided that maybe the best thing to do, for his peace of mind, was to be the one to decide when and where he'd see Sandy again. He didn't want to talk to her, or have her even know he was there. But Dave thought if he could get the initial sight of her - four months after she'd sandbagged him in the choir room - over with, he could deal with running across her accidentally if and when it happened. So that was how Dave found himself heading towards the auditorium, rather than staying far away from it like he usually did after one of Kurt's texts.

As he approached the door, he didn't hear any music, just some voices. Dave immediately pressed himself up against the back wall as soon as he entered, not wanting anyone to see him. Most of the members of New Directions were sitting on the stage, including Kurt, who was lounging back against an amplifier, talking to Mercedes and Blaine. He was wearing those skintight white jeans that had been the main cause of Dave's noticing how awesome his ass was two years ago. He was also sporting a thin, clingy black and white striped turtleneck, which, given the boy's penchant for dressing in layers, was probably meant to be worn under something else. Sure enough, Dave spotted a fuzzy grey sweater draped over the back of the amp. He noticed that there were a lot of flannel shirts, jackets, sweaters and other garments tossed aside on the stage, and figured they must be taking a break from an intense and sweaty rehearsal. Sandy was nowhere in sight, so he moved forward cautiously and took a seat in the very back row. He knew from when Santana had dragged him to see the glee club perform to Born This Way that between the bright stage lights and dim house lights, if you were towards the back of the auditorium you were as good as invisible.

Dave could barely take his eyes off of Kurt, much like that day last April. Seeing him stand there so tall and proud and oozing confidence in his _Likes Boys_ t-shirt, he was completely different than when he'd cringed and shaken under Dave's abuse. It was also that day that Dave had really noticed how much Kurt had changed physically since their sophomore year. He'd known that Kurt had gotten taller, of course; he'd been shocked the first day of school last year when he went to toss a welcome back slushie into his face, only to miss and hit his chest instead. But there were other things, like how his face wasn't soft and round anymore, and was instead more chiseled and angular. And when Kurt wore anything tightly fitted, like the turtleneck, Dave could see definite muscle definition in his chest and arms. It made him even more attractive to Dave, the same way straight guys probably liked seeing the girls get bigger boobs and rounder hips as they went through high school.

He probably would have felt like a creeper, only able to watch Kurt while lurking in the shadows, but for the fact that he was getting to see a fair amount of Kurt these days right out in the open. Shortly after their conversation in The Lima Bean, Kurt had stopped Dave in the hall to ask about starting the chapter of PFLAG he'd brought up junior year. "I've been so busy with glee, and applying for colleges in New York, I let it slip," Kurt had said. "But we still have the whole second semester, and if we get it up and running, it should have enough momentum for someone else to take over it after we graduate." Dave had agreed almost embarrassingly quickly, and since then he and Kurt had been meeting in the library and the coffee shop about the project. Dave had taken some crap for it from his teammates, but he brushed them off, telling them that it was something he'd agreed to last year and that "the administration" was holding him to it. Dave had begun to care less and less about what the other jocks thought of him as senior year progressed. He knew a lot of it was because he was much more concerned with what _Kurt_ thought of him, but it was also because he realized how little his high school reputation would matter in less than six months. He wasn't going to be a Lima Loser; like Kurt, he'd been researching and applying to different colleges all year. A lot of people wouldn't have thought it to look at him, but he was a very attractive university candidate; his grades were above average, he'd excelled in athletics, and the Bully Whips and now PFLAG were going to give him bonus points for community involvement. After hearing Kurt talk about how amazing New York City was, he'd even applied to Columbia and Fordham, the two colleges in the city that had football programs.

Kurt was talking animatedly, gesturing with his hands in that cute way he had when he was excited about something. Mercedes and Blaine were smiling back, and Blaine had that soft, adoring look on his face that he sometimes wore around Kurt. Dave found it interesting that while he occasionally saw Blaine with that expression when he saw him and Kurt together, he never saw Kurt with it. Maybe things were different when they were alone (something that Dave tried very hard not to think about), but most of the time when he saw them in the lunchroom or between classes, he'd have never guessed that they were a couple if he didn't already know it. Maybe they were just being discreet, despite the fact that everyone at McKinley knew they were together. But still, even when Kurt brought up Blaine from time to time, his voice didn't get any warmer or fonder than when he talked about Finn, Rachel or any of his other friends. Then again, maybe he was just trying to spare Dave's feelings. At this point, he was convinced that Kurt had to know that Dave liked him that way. They spent way too much time together for him to hide something he felt so strongly, and Kurt was an extremely perceptive person. If it bothered Kurt, though, he never let it show.

A loud clapping suddenly rang out, startling Dave. And then he heard it - his mother's voice. He shrank back in the chair. "Okay everyone," Sandy called out. "Break time's over. We need to get back to work. We've made some great progress, but it's not nearly as tight as it needs to be." She came out of the wings and looked around expectantly. "Everyone off their butts, pronto." Her tone was firm, but not nasty or mean; Dave thought that she must not be too hard on them, as the New Directions smiled and laughed as they got to their feet, grumbling only slightly. Sandy was wearing tan cargo Capri pants, a cropped black top that showed off her flat stomach, and sparkly ballroom shoes with high heels. Her long hair was up in a bun, with what looked like chopsticks holding it in place. It was a very strange experience for Dave, seeing her without Sandy knowing he was there. Normally, just the fact that she had blown into his life again set him off, so by the time he even really looked at her, he was already shaking with anger. But Dave didn't really feel angry this time. Instead, he felt hurt and sadness overwhelm him as he watched her gently adjust Rachel's turnout, and smile encouragingly at Finn while he attempted what looked like a difficult step. _Why couldn't she have been that patient, that nurturing with me?_ Dave thought. _Would it have been so hard, to love me enough to stay?_ He felt tears begin to well up in his eyes, something that hadn't happened while he was thinking about his mother in years. He usually fluctuated between hot anger and frozen numbness when he thought about Sandy. He wasn't sure why his heart was aching with such deep sorrow this time, but it was. _What kind of person would I have been, if you'd been there for me? I wouldn't have been so angry, I bet. Maybe I wouldn't have been a bully. Maybe I could have been like Kurt, and been okay with being gay. Maybe I wouldn't have given a crap about what other people thought, and Kurt and I could have been friends, instead of me torturing him for months._ His breath hitched as the tears spilled over, and he slapped his hand over his mouth to keep from following it up with an audible sob.

On the stage, oblivious to Dave's presence, Sandy and the New Directions ran through a combination. "Okay," she said. That looks fantastic!" She smiled brilliantly. "I think we're ready to take it from the top."

"Will you dance it through with us the first time?" asked Kurt.

"Well…" said Sandy, considering. The other members started jumping around and asking too, and she gave up, giggling like a teenager. "Yes, I'll do it with you the first time." Everyone cheered. "But," she said, "No watching me. You all know the choreography like the back of your hand. There's no need to cheat and start looking at me to see what comes next. Understood?" They all nodded, heading into their places.

The music started, heavily synthesized. Dave wiped his eyes and sniffed, grateful for the distraction. He thought he could slip out without being noticed now, but part of him wanted to stay and watch. Not to see Sandy dance, of course; but the rest of them, especially Kurt. From the moment Kurt had caught his notice, Dave had been mesmerized by how the lithe boy's body moved during performances; how his hips would swivel, and his legs would flex and extend enticingly. It would piss Dave off, afterwards. But while he was watching, all he could think about was how sexy Kurt Hummel was. He was always beautiful, but when he performed, he was smoking hot. He knew a lot of students, especially the guys, were uncomfortable watching "that flaming homo" bump and grind at assemblies. But Dave didn't know how anyone could watch Kurt perform and think it was anything but drop dead sexy. Just thinking about how Kurt had moved during _4 Minutes_ and _Toxic _had Dave staying exactly where he was, instead of getting up and leaving.

_Brittany!_ shouted Artie

_It's a new generation…of party people, _Brittany sang in response

_Get on the floor, get on the floor_, Artie rapped.

As Brittany sang the next line, the other members and Sandy began to move sinuously around the stage. _Let me introduce you to my party people. In the club…huh!_

Artie began rapping again, so quickly Dave couldn't make out all the words. But it wasn't like he was paying much attention. All of the New Directions were dancing in a way Dave had never seen before, except maybe for Mike Chang and Brittany. They were doing a crazy hip hop style with pops and locks so hard, Dave was surprised no one hurt themselves. Even Finn, who Dave knew from his brief stint in glee struggled with the simplest of choreographies, looked amazing and not awkward in the least. Kurt, as usual, looked incredible. He moved towards the front of the stage, and even though Dave knew he couldn't see him, he felt like Kurt was looking intently right at him. _Brazil, Morocco!_ he sang, along with the others. _London to Ibiza! Straight to LA New York, Vegas to Africa!_ Dave felt the front of his pants start to tighten, which was not at all an unusual occurrence when he watched Kurt perform.

The music changed to a slower part, and this time Santana sang. _Dance the night away, live your life and stay young on the floor…_ The dancing changed from fierce and aggressive to graceful and sensual. The girls extended their legs and each boy crouched down so the girls could place a leg on their shoulder. Then the boys rose slowly, lifting each girl's leg higher and staring into their partner's eyes passionately. Even Kurt, who was paired with Tina, appeared masculine and intense. _And when did those girls get so flexible?_ wondered Dave, eyes wide. _Jesus, they look like they're going to snap in half. What's Sandy been doing, stretching them out on a rack or something?_

Speaking of Sandy, Dave saw that she didn't have a partner, which made sense since she wasn't actually in the number. But even without one, her leg was extended upwards just like the other girls, and Dave couldn't help but be impressed with that kind of balance. _Of course she's good. All those years away from me, she was working on that sort of thing. It was much more important to learn how to do that, than to be changing my diapers or putting me on the bus for school_, he thought sarcastically. He turned his attention back to everyone else, as the song shifted back to a pulsing dance beat. He had to admit, this routine was the best thing he'd ever seen New Directions do. It didn't look like a high school glee club at all; it looked more like something you'd see in a music video, or in concert. _They are going to kick ass at Regionals and Nationals this year. Kurt's going to be so happy_. The thought made him smile.

Dave watched the rest of the number, mostly watching Kurt and enjoying the tingle it gave him when he did. But it was hard not to notice Sandy, even though he tried not to. She was just so much better than the glee kids, as great dancers as they had apparently become over the last month. His eyes just kept drifting back to her, unwillingly drawn by her astonishing technique and stage presence. He sighed. He didn't know when he'd managed to have the distance needed to appreciate anything that selfish bitch did, but anyone who wasn't blind or stupid had to admit that she was a brilliant dancer. And Dave, of course, was neither. _It doesn't mean anything_, he thought_. It doesn't mean I like __**her**__, just because I can admit that she's a great dancer._

Everyone hit their ending poses perfectly. Kurt's, naturally, was particularly fierce. It wasn't until Dave felt his hands start to come towards each other that he realized he'd almost started applauding. _Wow, way to stay under the radar, Karofsky_, he thought, gripping the arm rests like grim death. He watched as everyone on the stage jumped around in delight, hugging and laughing happily. Kurt ran up to Sandy and embraced her, and he caught her pressing a quick kiss to his hair. The affinity they had for each other was completely obvious, and Dave squirmed a little in his seat. _I am not jealous_, he thought. _Not that she likes him, or that he likes her. Whatever they have together, it has nothing to do with me. She's spoiled way too many things for me, and I am not letting her have any impact on my friendship with Kurt. I will be okay with the two of them liking each other if it kills me._

Rehearsal was coming to an end, and everyone started picking up their discarded outer layers. He heard Sandy tell everyone to drink plenty of water and stretch, and Dave took it as a sign that he should probably leave before he was discovered. As he walked away from the auditorium, his phone buzzed. He took it out, seeing that he had a text from Kurt. _We just finished_, it read. _She's on her way out, and we're going through the east doors, okay?_

_k_, he texted back. _thx for letting me know. c you in class 2morrow?_

After a moment, his phone buzzed again. _Of course. Want to meet at TLB after school, to talk about the PFLAG posters?_

Dave texted a reply, not even trying to keep the goofy grin off his face as he did. _love 2. i'll bring my laptop, & maybe we can work something up in PS?_

A few seconds later, he got Kurt's reply, and it made him feel so warm inside, it was like anything and everything bad in his life completely fell away. _That would be awesome. You have the *best* ideas. I can't wait! :D_

Dave stowed his phone in his back pocket, and walked in the opposite direction of the east doors briskly. He wanted to get home in time to do a load of laundry, so he could wear his favorite red-checked shirt to school the next day.

_**Whee! This fic has officially hit 100 reviews! Add to them, will you, by letting me know what you thought of this chapter? *puppy dog eyes***_

_**Oh, and On The Floor is by Jennifer Lopez featuring PitBull.**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thank you again for all the wonderful reviews! They keep the muse turned on and ready for action, LOL! **_

_**I've decided to change the genre categories of this story from General/Angst to Angst/Romance. Because Dave and Kurt decided to get a little friskier in this chapter than I originally intended them to.**_

Sandy and Blaine walked down the hallway, slowly so that Kurt could catch up to them as soon as he was done grooming himself after another active rehearsal. Sandy liked Blaine, who was extremely polite, talented, and seemed to treat Kurt well. She didn't think that Kurt and Blaine's relationship seemed very passionate, but who was she to talk? Passion had gotten her into nothing but trouble, whether it was her passion for Paul trapping her into an unplanned family, or her passion for dance pulling her inexorably away from her son. At least the boys couldn't knock each other up, thank God. Sandy didn't have the close connection with Blaine that she did with Kurt, but they had plenty in common and got along quite well.

"So, do you have any plans this afternoon?" Blaine asked, suddenly.

"As a matter of fact, no," Sandy replied. "I only run four classes on Wednesdays, and the first one's not 'till six. Why, did you want to go grab some coffee or something, the three of us?"

"No, I was hoping you might want to come to the first PFLAG meeting ," said Blaine, smiling broadly. "I'm surprised Kurt didn't invite you himself, but he and Dave have been so busy setting everything up, it probably just slipped his mind. I know he'd love to have you there, he's so proud of actually making it happen."

Sandy went pale. _Think, think,_ she tried to tell herself, but her mind was a field of white. She'd just said she was free, how could she turn around and suddenly not be free, just a minute later? This would be so much easier if Blaine knew about her being David's mother, but she and Kurt had kept the promise to keep it a secret from everyone, even Kurt's boyfriend of nearly a year. "Uhhh…," she stalled. "I'm not really sure if that's such a great idea."

"Why?" asked Blaine, looking very confused.

Truly, Sandy couldn't think of a single thing to say that wouldn't make Blaine suspicious about why she didn't want to go to the meeting. It wasn't like she could pretend to be uncomfortable with the whole gay thing; Blaine knew all too well that he and Kurt were far from being her first gay friends. Dammit, why couldn't she have remembered that it was today, and figured out that that was what Blaine was inviting her to? And why didn't she and Kurt expect something like this, and come up with a story, like about how they met? She was still standing there with Blaine staring at her bemusedly, when Kurt walked up to them.

"What's wrong?" he asked, immediately noticing Sandy's distress.

"I have no idea," said Blaine. "I just asked her to go to the PFLAG meeting with us." He looked at both of them, his expression going from confused to wary at Kurt's identical look of panic. "Is there something going on that you guys aren't telling me?" he said, a touch of irritation creeping into his voice.

Sandy looked at Kurt, who appeared to be at as much of a loss as her on how to deal with the situation. His green eyes were pleading with her do something, so she did. "No, of course not," she said, pasting a bright and completely artificial smile on her face. "I'd love to come, no problem." She thought that maybe she could buy enough time to fake an urgent text or something. "When is it?"

"It's…right now," said Kurt, trying to hide his horror. "We were on our way, and were just going to drop you at the doors as we passed."

"Oh," said Sandy. _**Oh, shit**__, is more like it._

They continued down the hall, Blaine apparently mollified for the moment, but still giving them the occasional funny look. Neither Sandy or Kurt said anything, each wrapped up in their own thoughts of how to get out of the potentially explosive situation. As they neared the room, Kurt spoke. "Hey, why don't you let me go in first, and wait behind for a minute? I just want to make sure everything's set up, okay?" Without waiting for an answer, he raced inside the room.

Dave was standing there, putting cookies on a plate. He turned to Kurt with a smile, then lost it instantly. He walked over to Kurt, a concerned look on his face. "What's wrong, Kurt? Are you okay?" He put his hands on Kurt's shoulders. "Did someone give you shit about the meeting on your way here?"

Kurt shook his head, looking down. He raised he head and gazed pleadingly into Dave's eyes, hoping he would understand, somehow. "Sandy's right outside the door," he said quietly. "She's coming to the meeting, Dave."

Dave snatched his hands off of Kurt's shoulders as if they were burning hot. His eyes narrowed, and he backed up a few steps. "What the fuck are you talking about?" he said, in a harsh whisper.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Kurt said. "I don't have a lot of time to explain. Blaine asked her, just a couple of minutes ago. Neither of us could figure out a way for her to say no, without telling him about her being your mother." Dave was looking at him so distrustfully, and it squeezed Kurt's heart. He tried to keep the rising tears out of his eyes and voice. "Please, Dave. _Please_ believe me. I know you don't trust her, but me? You know I would never hurt you like this, not on purpose. I just didn't know what to do. Blaine looked so suspicious, and I just…my mind went blank."

Dave looked at Kurt, and when the usual red haze faded, he could see Kurt's sincerity. God, he looked like he was on the verge of tears, and Dave had never, ever wanted to make Kurt cry again. "It's okay," he mumbled, and Kurt looked at him gratefully. "I need to get out of here. Let me know how it goes; send me a text or something afterwards."

"No!" exclaimed Kurt. Dave started to walk past him, and Kurt grabbed his hand, swinging him around and towards him. "Dave, you can't not be here. Not for our first meeting. We've both worked so hard on this. Please, stay," he begged. Dave looked down, and impulsively, Kurt cupped his cheek and tilted his face back up. They stood there for a moment, looking into each other's eyes. Dave struggled not to get lost in those green depths, in the feel of Kurt's fingers laid so gently on his cheek. Then a tear slipped from Kurt's eye, and Dave knew he was done for. "Please, Dave?" Kurt repeated, in a ragged whisper. Their faces were so close, Dave could feel Kurt's breath on his lips, and he closed his eyes.

"I'll stay," he whispered back. The he opened his eyes, and it was all too much. Kurt's soft hand on his cheek, the thankful smile, those unbelievably long lashes wet with tears…he couldn't help himself. Dave brought his face nearer to Kurt's, and watched in a daze as Kurt's head tilted slightly, his lips parting.

"Everything okay in here?" Blaine's loud voice rang out in the empty classroom. Kurt and Dave jumped apart, and Kurt turned around, trying to wipe all the traces of tears from his face. He moved over to the table and started placing more cookies on the plate, keeping his back to the door and trying to compose himself. He could feel how red his cheeks must be, and he was breathing heavily. _What the hell was that?_ Kurt thought.

Across the room, Dave was asking himself the same question. He too was flushed, and the back of his neck was damp with perspiration. He blew out a breath and turned to look at Blaine. If Kurt said he was suspicious before, he was extremely leery now. His eyes darted between Dave and his boyfriend's back, frowning. Suddenly, Dave saw a bright flash of blue come from behind Blaine, and found himself face to face with his mother. _When did this day turn into such a clusterfuck?_ he wondered.

_I'm sorry_, he saw her mouth quickly. Her eyes were worried. But then she smiled brightly and extended her hand. "Hi, I'm Sandy Girard, a friend of Kurt and Blaine's," she said with an almost manic cheer. "You must be David; Kurt's told me _so_ much about you."

Dave took her hand and shook it quickly, letting go as soon as he could. He realized that, despite her popping in and out of his life randomly, this was the first time he'd actually touched Sandy since he was six years old. He didn't know how he felt about that, but _totally weird_ seemed to sum it up nicely. "Dave," he said, trying to be civil with every fiber of his being. "It's nice to meet you."

"Dave," she repeated, nodding. "It's nice to meet you too." Just when the silence that followed spun out into slightly awkward, they were saved by the arrival of more people to the meeting. It broke the tension, and Blaine went over to talk to Kurt, whose color had finally returned to normal. Dave stayed near the door to greet everyone who came in.

After a few minutes, Dave started moving chairs into a circle, signaling the official start of the meeting. Burt, Finn and Carole had come, as had most of New Directions, Mr. Schuester, Ms. Pilsbury, Coach Bieste, and three underclassmen. And of course, Sandy, sitting as far away from Dave as she could get. Kurt started the meeting by welcoming everyone, then reading the PFLAG Mission Statement. "Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays promotes the health and well being of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons, their families and friends through _advocacy_, to end discrimination and secure equal civil rights; _education_, to enlighten an ill informed public; and _support,_ to cope with an adverse society." He set down the index card and smiled at the grouping. It was a great turnout, even better than he and Dave had expected.

"So what we're going to do next is go around the room and introduce ourselves," Kurt announced. "Your name, and if you like, what brings you to attend the meeting. But you can just say your name if you don't feel like sharing, or even just say 'pass'. Sometimes just listening can be the most helpful thing of all, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'll start," he said, pausing and tugging slightly at his vest. "I'm Kurt Hummel, one of the co-founders of the McKinley chapter of PFLAG. I am a gay son, and a gay brother," he said, looking beaming at his family.

Everyone took a turn, and most people did add more than just saying their name. One of the underclassmen, who turned out to be a sophomore named Michelle, said that she was there because she was a lesbian, but didn't think she could tell her uber-religious parents. Rachel, of course, shared that she was the daughter of two gay dads. Sandy simply said, "I'm lucky enough to have had many friends in my life, of various sexual orientations. I'm glad to find that moving to Lima has brought me some new ones." She grinned at Kurt, and he returned it.

They finally came to Dave. He and Kurt had planned what he was going to say carefully. It was both of their hopes that at one of these meetings, Dave would come out to the group. But no matter how much he wanted to do it, Dave just wasn't ready by the time the first meeting date rolled around. Kurt, of course, had assured him that there was plenty of time, and that he needed to be patient with himself. "I'm Dave Karofsky, the other co-founder of this chapter. Since last year, I've been trying to make sure that McKinley is a safe place for everyone, regardless of who they are, or who they like. I hope that being part of PFLAG can help with that." He looked over at Kurt, who nodded and smiled. Dave hoped it was a sign that he hadn't messed things up too badly with that..whatever that was, that they had shared earlier.

Santana sitting next to Brittany, spoke next. "I'm Santana Lopez. I came because…" she trailed off, looking at Brittany, and then over to Dave. Everyone waited quietly while the girl obviously struggled with what to say. She finally huffed out a bitter laugh, then looked up with a typically bitchy expression. "I came because I heard there were cookies," she said. She folded her arms and slouched back in her chair, looking defiantly at Kurt like she expected him to toss her out. Kurt just raised an eyebrow at her, then looked at Brittany, who looked sad and disappointed. "Britt?" he said, gently.

"I'm Brittany S. Pierce," she said, looking down. "I'm here because I'm kind of confused about what I am. When I like someone, I don't really think about whether they're a boy or a girl. I don't really care. I guess that makes me…I don't know, I heard the word bisexual once. But I'm not sure if that's what I am."

"A lot of people are confused about that sort of thing," Kurt said softly. "It's really not that unusual." He was shocked to hear a snort from next to him.

Everyone in the room stared at Blaine, who had an uncharacteristically pissy look on his face. "Gee, Kurt," he said, somewhat bitingly. "I thought you didn't believe in bisexuality."

Kurt turned red, but didn't say anything. _Why would Blaine try to embarrass me like this?_ he thought. But then he looked over, and realized that Blaine was actually angry at him. _How much did he see of Dave and I, earlier? _Kurt wondered. _Oh, crap._ He glanced over at Dave, who looked as if he was about a minute from walking across the room and strangling Blaine. He tried to push his relationship drama aside, not wanting to derail the meeting. He decided to be honest, since that's what these meetings were about. And if _he_ couldn't be honest, how could he expect someone like Dave, or Santana to be? "I believe that people can be confused," he said. "But I still have a hard time accepting that someone wouldn't have a preference either way. It just seems more like, I don't know, being dragged back towards what society expects, than really being attracted to both genders equally." He looked around the room. Some people, like his dad, looked like they were confused by the conversation in general. A couple looked like they totally agreed with Kurt; and a few others, he was sad to see, looked hurt by his words. Especially Brittany. His eyes came to Sandy's, and stopped dead. Her expression was..aghast. Appalled. She was looking at Kurt like he'd just said he wanted to go to one of those conversion camps over the summer. Kurt flushed, immediately uncomfortable. Sandy had never expressed any kind of disapproval towards Kurt, and he was surprised to feel how harshly it stung. "What?" he asked, haughtily.

"You don't believe in bisexuality, Kurt?" she asked, eyes wide.

"I guess that's what I just said," replied Kurt, going on the defensive.

Sandy barked out a laugh. "That's like not believing in air!" she exclaimed. She turned away from him and looked at Brittany. "Of course bisexuality exists, sweetie," she assured her. She turned back to Kurt, pinning him with her stare. Clearly, he'd struck some kind of a nerve with her. "You know, Kurt," she said with mock briskness, "If you're going to walk around with an LGBT rainbow shining out of your butt, you might want to think about having some respect for _all_ the letters. The B is there for a reason, you know."

Kurt looked down, ashamed. He didn't know what to say. He thought about the mission statement he'd read, about how PFLAG was about educating the uninformed, and putting an end to discrimination. Were those just words to him, or did he really mean them? Did he think that PFLAG was only to improve the lives of people who were just like him? With growing remorse, he thought about all the times he'd teased Dave for not being properly gay, because he didn't listen to Lady Gaga or like to shop. _If you're going to be gay, you simply __**must **__know who that is_, he remembered saying to Dave once, and winced at the condescending tone he could now hear himself using so blithely. He raised his head, realizing that everyone was looking at him expectantly. Dave looked worried, and shot a glare at his mother, who for once refused to wilt at the sight of it. "I'm sorry," Kurt said. "You're right, it's not at all in line with what this club is supposed to stand for, if I think that someone else's sexuality is somehow less worthy than mine. I'm sorry, Brittany."

The blond girl smiled sweetly at him. "That's okay Kurt. Like I said, it's confusing. I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets confused." Her unaffected, easily forgiving response broke the tension, and a little wave of laughter rippled through the room.

"I've talked a lot about how ignorant people in Lima are about gay people, and how they need to be educated." He looked over at Dave, hoping he would understand the unsaid apology. He'd make sure he gave him a proper one later, though. "Clearly, I need to be educated just as much as anyone. And that's exactly what this club is for." Kurt turned to Sandy, who was now smiling at him, all ire wiped clean. She looked proud of him, and Kurt was glad that their first argument was able to be resolved so quickly. Even if it did have to happen so embarrassingly in public. _And Blaine and I will be having a chat about that later, I believe._

"You might be bisexual," Sandy said to Brittany, trying to guide the meeting in a constructive direction. "But it sounds more like you might be pansexual." At the sea of baffled faces, she explained. "People who believe that gender is completely irrelevant to they choose as a partner. You could be attracted to or fall in love with boys, or girls. Or even people who don't identify as either a boy or a girl."

Out of the corner of his eye, Kurt saw another one of the underclassmen - a slight boy who had only given his name as Jamie - whip his head up to stare at Sandy.

"I'm no expert," Sandy said, turning to look at both Dave and Kurt. "I only know what I've learned from my friends and acquaintances over the years. You guys might want to think about getting a guest speaker in here, someone who knows more and can explain things better. I doubt you'll find anyone in Lima, but I'm sure you could get someone to come in from Columbus, or Cleveland."

"That sounds like a great idea," said Kurt. "Does anyone have any ideas on where we should start, or want to help find someone?" Rachel mentioned that she thought her dads might have some resources, and the rest of the meeting was spent discussing that, and other types of speakers PFLAG might want to bring in.

Four o'clock arrived, more quickly than they had anticipated. Kurt called an end to the meeting, but invited everyone to stay for the cookies and punch that Dave had provided. Most people did, and they broke off into small groups. Dave watched from across the room as that Jamie kid went up to Sandy, and said something to her. She put his hand on his shoulder, nodding understandingly. Making a decision, Dave made his way across the room, stopping occasionally when someone to thanked him, or congratulated him on the success of the first meeting. He stood to the side, waiting for Sandy and Jamie's conversation to come to an end.

"…not alone, you hear me?" he heard Sandy say. "Hang in there, and come back next week, okay?"

"Will you be here?"Jamie asked.

Sandy hesitated. "I'm not sure. My schedule is…kind of unpredictable." At Jamie's fallen face though, she continued. "I'll try, though. I promise. And you'll come back either way?" Reluctantly, Jamie nodded. Sandy patted his shoulder as the boy walked away. Turning, she jumped when she saw Dave standing next to her.

"David!" she exclaimed breathlessly. "You startled me! I didn't see you standing there."

Dave stood there silently. It was hard, to make the first words come out. He'd never willingly had a conversation with Sandy before, not since he was almost too young to remember it. Finally, he spoke. "You know a lot," he said, gruffly. "About the whole gay thing."

_Oh my God, is he actually talking to me? _Sandy thought wildly_. Keep cool, don't be weird or intense. Keep it light. Don't scare him off, no matter what you do. You may never get a chance like this again._ "Well," she said, "it's not exactly my first PFLAG meeting."

"It's not?" said Dave, clearly surprised.

"My gay-to-straight friend ratio is about sixty-forty, in favor of Kurt's team," she said. "If you limit it to just my guy friends, that jumps to about eighty-twenty." She smiled, noticing how Dave's perfectly shaped eyebrows, so much like her own, shot up nearly to his hairline. "Not a lot of straight guys in the chorus line, to say the least." She waited, to see if bringing up her dancing would upset her son.

Instead, he took a drink of punch. "I'll bet," he replied, surprising her.

Kurt was standing with his family, when he glanced over and saw that Sandy and Dave were engaged in what inexplicably appeared to be civil discussion. His knees nearly buckled in shock. "Holy shit," he said, not nearly as quietly as he had wanted to.

"Kurt! Language!" scolded Carole.

"Sorry," he said, barely even registering her admonishment. "Just…saw something that surprised me. Can you excuse me for a minute?" Without waiting for an answer, he skulked along the wall as close to Dave and Sandy as he dared, then took out his phone and pretended to text rapidly.

"Look," he heard Dave say. "I just came over here to say…" There was a long, awkward pause. "I didn't want you here. I was pissed that you showed up."

"I know," said Sandy, desperately. "And I'm so sorry. If I could have thought of any way to avoid it, I would have. It was just an impossible situation, for both Kurt and I. I hope you won't be too mad at him. He would never do anything to hurt you."

"I know that," said Dave, as if the idea was ridiculous, and Kurt couldn't believe how relieved he was to hear it. "That's not what I wanted to talk about, anyway."

"What, then?" Sandy asked.

"This meeting…and PFLAG in general. It's not about me. I put it together, with Kurt, but it's not about me at all. You helped them today. Brittany, and Jamie. And even Kurt." Dave brought his fingers to the bridge of his nose and pinched, a gesture Sandy associated so strongly with his father, it made her heart twinge with nostalgia. Dave laughed, brokenly. "I can't believe I'm saying this. I must be out of my fucking mind," he said.

"What?" Sandy asked, not even daring to hope it was something positive.

Her son looked back at her, his eyes much too old to be in a teenager's face. "It was a good thing, that you came. It made the meeting better, more helpful than it would have been if you weren't here."

Sandy stared at Dave in shock. Kurt fumbled his phone and nearly dropped it, completely blowing his cover. He gave up and gaped at Dave and his mother.

"You can come back next week, if you want," Dave said. "Jamie, he wants you to. I think he needs you to, if he's going to keep coming, at least for now. And I know Kurt wants you here too."

"Are you serious?" whispered Sandy, completely incredulous.

"Apparently so," said Dave. "I might not talk to you next week. I probably won't. But if you can keep helping, I won't stand in the way of that. It's too important. It's not fair of me to screw that up, by being selfish."

Sandy continued to stare at her son. There were so many things she wanted to say to him.

_I'm so proud of the man you've become. _

_I'm sorry I left. I can understand if you never forgive me for it._

_I love you, even if you don't believe it._

_You are a better person than I could ever dream of being. You're __**amazing**__, David. I can't believe something as good as you could have come from me._

But she knew he didn't want to hear any of those things from her. She hadn't earned the right to say them to him. So she choked back her tears, and smiled. "Thank you, Davi…I mean, Dave. I'll be here, then." Then she turned and walked away, not even bothering to try and find Kurt to say goodbye. She figured if she could go right to the studio, she could indulge in a thirty minute cry before having to clean herself up for the third graders and their mothers.

Dave watched her leave, then turned. Only to be faced with the sight of Kurt, gawking at him. He blushed. "Shit, Kurt," he murmured quietly. "I didn't know you were there." He wondered how much Kurt had heard of his conversation with Sandy. From his stunned expression, Dave guessed it was quite a bit.

After a moment, Kurt closed his mouth, and approached Dave. He spoke barely above a whisper, and Dave had to lean in to hear him properly. "That is the bravest, most altruistic thing I have ever seen with my own eyes, Dave." Dave didn't at first recognize the look Kurt was giving him. It was almost like he was marveling at Dave; in awe of him. It didn't make sense. Kurt was the one who was incredible. Dave was just…extraordinarily ordinary, like Kurt had said last year. So he was smart enough to see the sense in letting Sandy come to the PFLAG meetings? Big whoop. But his eyes widened, when Kurt drew even closer.

"Whatever," Dave said, trying for a nonchalant shrug.

"I'm not going to do it," said Kurt, his green eyes turning a deep emerald Dave didn't think he'd ever seen before. "There's a bunch of people here, and I don't want to call unwanted attention to you. To embarrass you. But just so you know…I wish I could hug you, Dave. I want to hug you so badly, it's kind of killing me not to."

"You could," said Dave. "I don't mind. But Blaine…" his words were cut off, as Kurt threw his arms around Dave in a warm embrace.

"Whatever," he heard Kurt whisper. Dave smiled, tightening his arms around Kurt. They both sort of heard the din of conversation die away. And a minute later, the slamming of a door. But mostly, they heard each other's heartbeats, and their breaths, as they clung to each other like their lives depended on it.

_**I hope that no one is offended by Sandy going off on Kurt a little. I'm a totally Kurtsie, myself; but still, I think his character has flaws which makes him all the more real and precious to me. As out and proud as he is, there's still some sheltered Lima boy in him, and I have to admit to being irked when he occasionally expresses the same stereotyping that he's been the victim of.**_

_**It looks like there are maybe two more chapters to this story. In the next, I plan to bring Paul Karofsky in, to get his take on this whole thing. Sound interesting? Leave a review and let the muse know you want her to crack the whip on me. ;)**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Do I have to say it again? You, my readers - especially those who review - you totally rock my world. Every single one of you; you are worth every moment of time I take away from my family to write (not too much, I promise!), every minute of sleep I give up to finish off a chapter (more than I should), and every risk I take to type up a few lines of fic into Notepad while working my soul-sucking day job. Thank you all so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings and real -life experiences with me. It makes me a better writer, and a better person.**_

Dave walked into his house, hanging his letterman jacket on a peg and stowing his book bag in the mud room. He also kicked his sneakers off into the corner, padding into the living room in his socks. His dad was lounging on the couch, typical for a Friday, watching Sports Center with his work shirt still on but jacket and tie discarded.

"Hey, David," Paul said. "Did you have a good time at the Hummel's?"

"Yeah," replied Dave. "Finn got this new Xbox game, _LA Noir_. It was pretty cool, and even Kurt was totally into it. When I told him that it was the first video game to be shown at the Tribeca Film Festival, it completely sucked him in," Dave said, with a chuckle. His dad looked at him, with an expression that was half proud, and half surprised. "What?" asked Dave, feeling a tad self-conscious.

"Nothing," Paul said. "Just…it's always so strange to hear you talking about how close you and Kurt are." Dave wasn't sure what his face was communicating; but whatever it was, it caused the older man to backtrack a bit. "Not that there's anything wrong with that. On the contrary, I think it's wonderful."

"He's cool to hang out with," Dave said, guardedly. "I guess I wouldn't have thought it a few months ago, but he is."

"I'm not judging you, David," his dad said. "Or Kurt. It's just when I think of those awkward meetings with Kurt and Burt, last year? It's pretty incredible that the two of you have come so far."

_You have no idea_, thought Dave.

Paul continued. "I know things got a little blown out of proportion on his end, but it was still generous of him to accept your apology. He seems like a good kid."

It wasn't the first time that his father had suggested, while discussing Dave's previous behavior, that the bullying was much ado about nothing. Dave felt the guilt rise in him; not just in remembering what he did to Kurt, but for letting his dad continue to believe that the bullying was some sort of minor thing that got exaggerated in the mind of an overly sensitive gay boy. It was time to come clean, about that part, at least. He owed it to Kurt, and to his dad as well. "He didn't blow anything out of proportion," Dave said, nervously.

"What do you mean," asked Paul, honestly puzzled.

"I know I said back then that it was no big deal. That Kurt was being a drama queen, and his family was crazy over-protective. But…that's not the truth. Not at all."

"I don't think I understand," Paul said, looking worriedly at his son.

"No, you don't," Dave replied. "But you will, after I explain it to you. I should have never let you go on believing that it was no big deal. I was just afraid to tell you, 'cause I knew how disappointed you'd be in me."

"Whatever happened, it couldn't have been as bad as you're making it out to be. You're just taking it to heart, because you and Kurt are friends now," Paul said.

"I tortured him," said Dave, looking at his dad seriously, all traces of nerves gone. "There's no other word to describe it. I followed him around, snuck up on him, just to see how scared I could make him. I threw him into walls and lockers, really hard. He wouldn't have even had a chance to heal from the bruises I gave him, because I did it every day, sometimes more than once a day." He paused, and Paul opened his mouth to say something, clearly shocked by Dave's confession. Dave held up his hand. "Don't…just, just let me tell you all of it. Then you can talk, okay?

Paul nodded, eyes wide. _I can't believe I'm hearing this_, he thought. _Not my David, he's a good boy, at heart._

"I saw that he was getting thinner, that he had circles under his eyes. I kept doing it anyway." He stopped for a minute, gearing himself up for the hardest part. _Well, the hardest part that I'm going to tell him about_, that is, thought Dave. "That day in Figgins's office, I said that saying, "I'll kill you," was just a figure of speech. But it wasn't."

Paul gasped, forgetting that he was supposed to stay quiet. "David! You couldn't have possibly meant-"

"I didn't mean that I was going to plot his murder. But I did mean that I was going to beat the ever living _shit_ out of him, if he told. So badly, he wouldn't be able to walk away from it under his own power, maybe."

Just talking about it brought Dave back, momentarily, to that dark and cold place. For the first time, Paul Karofsky saw a shadow of what Kurt had been faced with, for months and months. His son was barely recognizable to him in that moment, and it made him slightly nauseous. How _did I not see it?_ he wondered. _How could I not know what my own child was capable of?_

"And if I had done that, I might have killed him. I'm so much bigger than he is, and he doesn't know anything about how to fight. We had this guest speaker at PFLAG a couple of weeks ago, talking about hate crimes, and how stuff like that happens all the time. Sometimes nobody means for it to go down that way, but at the end of the day you still wind up with one kid dead and another in jail." Dave thought about how he had managed to hold it together during the meeting, but later had broken down in tears while Kurt was giving him a ride back home. Kurt had simply pulled over, unbuckled their seatbelts, and drawn Dave into his arms while the bigger boy sobbed until he had no tears left. He'd shushed Dave softly, and murmured comfortingly over and over again the words he knew Dave needed to hear so badly. _It's okay, Dave. It's in the past now. I forgive you._

"That he was able to forgive me?" Dave said. "It wasn't just generous, or kind. It's a miracle. He's the best person I've ever met, Dad." The icy stranger was gone, and Paul saw his son again, looking at him through misty eyes. "I hope you can forgive me too. For not being honest with you about this."

Paul lunged forward off the couch, wrapping his arms around Dave. "God, you don't even have to ask. Of _course_ I do." He hugged his son for a good long time, until both of them were teary-eyed. Paul ended the embrace, but kept him hands on Dave's shoulders. "I'm the one that should be sorry. For not noticing what a dark place you were in. And for…whatever it is that I did, that made you think you couldn't tell me. You can tell me anything, David. You know that, right?"

Dave nodded, but inside he was thinking, _Not everything. I can't tell you that I'm gay, and I honestly have no idea why. I know you'll still love me, just like Kurt's dad still loves him. Why is it so hard, then?_ "You don't have to be sorry. I put a lot of effort into hiding it from you. And you've never made me think that you'd hate me, or turn away from me. It just got all mixed up in my head, and the longer I kept it a secret, the harder it was to tell you."

"I love you, son," Paul said. "I know we're both too busy being manly to say it much, but I do."

Dave smiled, happy that his dad was trying to lighten the mood. It was a good sign. "I love you too, Dad."

"I'm just so proud of you," Paul said. "Especially that now I _really _know how much you've turned things around. Helping to stop with the bullying, and starting PFLAG with Kurt. And you're even letting your mother back in a little. Honestly, I never thought I'd see the day."

Dave pulled back, his smile disappearing and shoulders hunching a bit. "Just because I let her come to the meetings, and can be civil to her if she's still in the room when I meet Kurt after glee rehearsal, doesn't mean I'm letting her in," he said defensively.

"David, really," his dad said. "We're having a pretty honest moment here. Which, by the way, we apparently need to do more often." He smiled gently, seeing Dave's shoulders relax. "Don't bullshit me, son. You would get upset and leave the room if I brought her up, for years. And now, you can be in the same room with her. Speak to her. I think that's pretty big." Paul wondered if David knew that he was actually _pouting_. He didn't think he'd seen his son pout since Paul had refused to buy him one of the BTR Transformers for his 10th birthday. "There's nothing wrong with it. I always hoped you'd give her a chance, one of these days."

"Why?" asked Dave. "I've never understood why you always wanted me to reconnect with her. And why you never, ever said a bad word against her, the whole time I was growing up. I know she left us both. But I was just a baby, and didn't even know she was gone. But you?" Dave looked at Paul, his expression a mix of sadness and confusion. "She was your _wife_. Didn't it hurt you when she left?"

Paul stood for a moment, silently. "If we're going to talk about this, I think I need a beer," he said. He left the room, returning with two bottles of Fat Head's Bushwhacker beer.

"Double-fisting it, dad?" said Dave. "That's not like you." Paul enjoyed his beer; but always, for Dave's entire life, in moderation.

"Nope, this one's for you." Paul handed one of the beers over, enjoying a little how his son's jaw dropped. "We are going to have our first father-son beer together. I personally can't think of a better time or place for it." He clinked the bottles together. "Cheers, David."

Dave stared at his father, totally awed. His dad had always been fairly cool, not freaking out over curfews or having six thousand rules that had to be followed to the letter. But this was something else. It was really, totally kind of awesome. Dave took a sip of his beer, which was a lot better than that Milwaukee's Best crap in a keg at all the football parties; it actually tasted good, as opposed to a slightly tolerable way to get wasted. It certainly wasn't Dave's first beer, but it was definitely the best one he'd ever had. And for reasons far more important than the quality of the brew.

They sat down on the couch together. After a moment of contemplating his beer, Paul started talking again. "Of course it hurt me, David," he said. "It broke my heart."

"Then why don't you hate her?" Dave asked, honestly mystified.

"Because…because it wasn't all her fault. I should have known from the very first that we would never work out. But she was so beautiful, so different than any other girl I'd ever met in Lima. I was a bit of a late bloomer, I guess you'd call me. I was on the football team in high school, but I never dated much. Like you."

_Yeah, exactly like me_, Dave thought. _Except that I'm pretty sure the reason you didn't date much wasn't because the bumps seemed like they were in all the wrong places when it came to girls._

"It wasn't just that she was pretty, though that was what caught my eye first. She just had this…energy, crackling around her so vibrantly, you could almost see it. She knew exactly who she was, and what she wanted to do. Her confidence, especially for someone as shy as me, was breathtaking. I can't believe I even got up the nerve to ask her out. But I thought it was worth the risk, for someone so special."

Dave tried not to think about how he knew someone a lot like that, who was most definitely not his mother.

"She was always honest with me, that she needed to get out of Lima and pursue her dancing. I told her I was fine with that, and at the time, I really meant it. But when she told me she was pregnant, I was overjoyed. I thought it was divine intervention; the universe showing her that she could be happy here, with me." Paul took a long drink of his beer. "I changed the rules of the relationship overnight. Suddenly, everything I had agreed to, I tossed out the window and expected her to be a completely different person. Sure, your grandparents had a hand in that. But I was nearly thirty years old, and should have known better. But I just wanted her and I and you to be a family so much, I didn't care."

"So that made it okay for her to wig out on us?" said Dave, stubbornly.

"No, of course not. But I have to take responsibility for the fact that I set up the whole thing for failure, well before you were born." Paul looked at Dave and put a hand on his leg. "I don't regret it, not at all. It gave me you; and I would put her through it, go through all of it again myself if I had to. Just so we're clear? Every moment of pain was worth it, to have you sitting here with me today." When Paul was sure that David understood and believed him, he continued. "I hid my head in the sand. Maybe like I did with you. I didn't know you were so troubled, that you would do what you did to Kurt. I tried to ignore how miserable she was. How she never smiled; never said 'I love you' back to me, from the day we were married. We could have talked about it. We could have gotten counseling. But I didn't want to bring it up, because I thought it would make her realize she needed to leave in order to be happy again." He laughed a little at the irony.

For the first time in his entire seventeen years on Earth, Dave realized he felt a little sorry for his mother. His dad had alluded to all of this before, but he'd never listened. He was too angry, too hurt to see anything but his own anguish. But now, there was that little twinge. And suddenly, Kurt's voice was in his head. _Right after I felt that little twinge of sympathy, I felt…I don't know, a little lighter. Like I'd been squeezed in a vise, and someone was finally loosening it a little._

"I was an idiot," Paul said. "It might have saved our marriage. But instead, I just kept plowing through and hoping that one day she would magically wake up with a desire to be a stay-at-home mom, instead of a world famous dancer." He took another sip of his beer. "When I saw the note, it didn't shock me at all. Instead, it was more like a feeling that the other shoe had finally dropped."

"So you stayed in touch with her, and tried to get me to accept her because…what? You owed her?"

"Yes; at least, in part. But mostly, I did it because I thought it was what was best for you. Since the day I found out your mother was carrying you, that's always been my number one priority. Sandy's not even close to perfect, David. She did something terrible, that hurt us both. But there was never a time when I thought that ignoring the situation was a better solution than addressing it. I learned that lesson with her. Or at least, I thought I had."

"Why didn't you ever get married again?" Dave asked. It was something that he's always wondered about. Particularly around the time that he'd heard that Kurt's dad and Finn's mom were tying the knot. "Is it…is it because you're still in love with her?"

"No. I'm not in love with her anymore. It took me a long time to get past that, probably longer than it should have. But as you get older, it's harder to meet new people. Especially when you're a single parent. And I'm not exactly Hugh Jackman." He and Dave both laughed. "I sometimes think I should try that internet dating thing that everyone's always raving about. Maybe some lonely lady out there within fifty miles of Lima is looking for someone just like me."

"At the risk of sounding like a chick?" said Dave. "If she is, she'd be lucky to have you."

"At the risk of sounding like a chick?" repeated Paul. "That's one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me." He grew serious again, though. "Part of me will always love Sandy, though," said Paul. "I don't expect you to be able to understand that."

"Good," said Dave, gulping down his own beer. "Because I totally don't."

"Someday, David," his dad predicted, "you'll meet a girl. She'll knock your socks off. You'll do all kinds of things you never thought you'd do, and feel things you'd never thought you'd feel, all because of her."

_I think I already met her_, thought Dave. _But she's not a she, she's a he. _He took one more pull of his beer, draining it. "Hey, Dad?" he said.

"Yeah?"

"There's something else I need to tell you. You want another beer?"

Paul finished off his bottle as well. "Sure, that would be great. Get another for yourself if you want, but that's it for you, young man," he said with mock sternness.

Dave went to the refrigerator and pulled out two more beers. Making his way back to the living room, he handed one to his dad, then sat back down on the couch. He toyed a little at the foil label on his beer, staring at it. After a minute or so, he looked back over at his father. "I left something out, earlier," he said.

"About what?" said Paul.

"About what happened with Kurt and I." He took a deep breath. "Do you remember, when Coach Sylvester asked what it was that I threatened to kill Kurt for talking about?"

"Yes," said Paul, not quite sure where this was going. "Kurt said you didn't want him to report you for picking on him."

"There was more to it than that," Dave admitted.

"Like what?"

"I didn't want him to tell anyone…that I kissed him."

Now it was Paul's turn to stare. "What?" he said, incredulously.

"I kissed Kurt. At the time, I did it because I was angry, and confused." He paused, giving Paul a moment to absorb. "But I'm not confused any more. Or angry. PFLAG, and Kurt, have helped me a lot with that. I'm gay, Dad."

"You're…."

"Gay," said Dave. "As in, I like boys. When I dated Santana last year, I was just trying to cover it up. I don't like girls, don't want to fool around with girls, don't find them appealing at all. And I haven't for a long time." God, the relief of it, of finally coming out to someone willingly. Of coming out to his father. Dave felt like a thousand pound weight had fallen off his shoulders. _Kurt told you it would feel like this_, he reminded himself. _Not that you really believed him. But he was so right. Then again, he usually is._

Paul stared at Dave. "Oh," he said, as if Dave had mentioned he'd brought tacos home for dinner. "That's…well, that's just fine, I guess." It was totally obvious his dad had no idea what to say, and at the same time, was terrified he'd say the wrong thing.

"It is?" asked Dave. He was pretty sure his dad would have been okay with it, but there was always a little part of Dave that worried. That his father would think he was wrong, or gross. He drank some of his beer, giving Paul a little more time.

"Yeah," said Paul. "I mean…I'd be lying if I said I'm not completely taken by surprise. But I'm not upset about it."

"I'm so glad," said Dave. "Thank you, Dad, for being so cool about it"

"You don't have to thank me, David. I'm your father; I'll always love and support you no matter what."

"I know. But I felt like saying it anyway." His dad smiled at him, but then his expression changed, like he'd just thought of something. "What?" he asked.

"So does this mean you and Kurt…? I mean, you two spend a lot of time together. Are you…"

Dave chuckled. "No, Dad. We're just friends."

"It's okay if you are, you know," Paul assured him. "To be honest, I like him a lot better than Santana."

"You and me both," said Dave. "But no, he already has a boyfriend." Dave downed the rest of his beer, starting to feel just the hint of a buzz. Enough of one to keep talking to his dad about this, without getting too embarrassed. "I'd like to, though. I'd like to be more than friends with him."

"I see," said Paul, neutrally.

"But even if he wasn't with Blaine, it wouldn't work out. He deserves someone better than me." Dave looked at his shoes, sighing.

"I think I might just have to throw your own words back at you. I disagree completely; he'd be lucky to have you."

"Kurt deserves the best, Dad. He deserves someone like himself, who's brave and strong and out."

"David," Paul said, but refused to continue until his soon looked him in the eye. "To tell me everything you've told me tonight? I think that was pretty damn brave. It takes a mountain of strength to turn your life around like you have. And you just came out to me, right?"

"Yeah, I guess," mumbled Dave.

"Look, whatever you decide to do about it, that's your decision. Your business. You can talk to me if about it any time you want or need to. But don't _ever_ think that you're unworthy of someone's love, son. Because it's not true." He took Dave's bottle and his own, and set them on the table. "Now come here and give your old man a hug." They embraced warmly. "So, said Paul, letting go. "You want to watch some ESPN and order a pizza?"

"That sounds great. But first, I uh…" Dave trailed off, looking at the stairs that let up to his bedroom.

"Let me guess. You want to let Kurt know you finally told me you were gay?" His dad gave him a knowing look, and Dave blushed.

"Yeah, kinda. It'll just take a little while, I'll be done by the time the pizza gets here." He walked up the stairs to his room, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He sat on his bed and called Kurt. The phone rang a couple of times, then Kurt's high voice answered.

"Dave? Is something wrong?" he asked.

"No, not at all," Dave replied.

"It's just…you just left a little over an hour ago," Kurt said. "I'm surprised to hear from you so soon." There was a pause, then Kurt said hurriedly," Not that I mind! You can call me whenever. You know that, right?"

Dave smiled. "Yes, Kurt," he said patiently. "I know that."

"So anyway, what's up?"

Dave opened his mouth to tell him, but then realized it wasn't something he wanted to say over the phone after all. "I was just wondering, would you like to get breakfast tomorrow? I have something to tell you, and I want to do it in person."

"Is everything okay?" said Kurt, sounding worried.

"Yes, I promise. It would just be better to do it in person, if you're free." _So I can look at your face when I tell you. Because you'll be proud of me, and I love how you look when that happens._

"Sure, I was going to meet Blaine for coffee around ten, but I'll tell him lunch would be better after all."

"Okay, thanks," said Dave. "I'll see you tomorrow, Kurt."

"See you tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Dave," said Kurt, then hung up.

_Tonight?_ thought Dave, _I doubt that will be a problem_. He shoved his phone back into his pocket, and headed downstairs to watch TV with his dad.

_**Guess where I'm going tomorrow night? I have VIP tickets to Glee Live! I'm guaranteed a seat in the first 20 rows! Asdfghjk I am so excited! I know it's going to be amazing. But Sunday I should be able to get back to some writing, and I'm sure I'll be totally inspired by everything I see and hear. xoxoxoxoxo**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**So I said there was one more chapter of Mother's Day, and then the muse said, "I beg your pardon? I think this thing needs an epilogue, missy!" So this will be the last full chapter, but there's one more piece left after all. I know some of you (based on reviews) will be sad to see it end. But as with all fics, it's not really an end, but a beginning; I can then move on to the next story, which I hope you will all love as well.**_

_**For sure, I want reviews on this. I always do, as they feed the muse. But you know what would be even better? Check out "Rolling In The Deep" by Zombiebubbles here on FFN, and throw some reviews her way. It's one of THE BEST fics I've read, and somehow after 16 chapters it barely has 100 reviews. It's a crime against fanfic. So please, give her some love. She deserves it, and without her and bunches of other writers, I'd never have the inspiration to keep myself sharp and on my toes.**_

Dave walked towards the choir room, scanning the hallway idly and returning the couple of smiles sent his way. He was glad to see no dirty looks shot his way, and only one person avert their eyes away from him uncomfortably. And that had been a baseball player who had given him the hairy eyeball once, only to find himself pressed firmly against a locker and being reminded that Dave's gayness didn't make him any smaller or less intimidating if he put his mind to it. The night Dave had come out to his father, he'd invited Paul to come to the next PFLAG meeting. He needed his support, because at that meeting, Dave had finally told everyone what he'd been hiding for so long. Not wanting to beat around the bush, he'd done it at the very beginning of the introductions. "I'm Dave Karofsky, the other co-founder of this chapter of PFLAG. And I…" he trailed off, looking at Kurt and giving him a small, one-sided smile. He looked back at the group. "I'm also a gay son. And I'm grateful that my dad is here today to support me." Unconsciously, he flicked his eyes to Sandy as the gasps and murmurs rose around him. He thought she'd be shocked, but she was looking at him with a gentle, knowing smile instead. Dave thought that maybe Kurt had let his secret slip, but when he asked him about it later - wrapped in another one of Kurt's joyful, proud embraces - Kurt swore he'd never said a word to her.

After the meeting, word had gotten around the school that Dave was playing for Team Rainbow, and Dave didn't deny it. They were just a little over two months from graduation, and he was going to spend it being as out and honest as the boy whose bravery he'd admired for so long. The boy who, he had recently admitted to himself, was a lot more to him than just a crush. Dave was in love with Kurt, no matter how pathetic and unrequited it was. He'd had to deal with a fair amount of crap from people since then, but he'd been able to tough-guy his way through most of it. Even he and Azimio had come to an understanding. There'd been some shoving and pushing during the initial confrontation, but it had more the feel of manly-man posturing, rather than a true expression of anger. Finally, Az had told him, "I don't get it, and I don't think I want to. But if it's what you are, I guess you can't help it. I won't give you shit about it, man." Dave had appreciated his honesty, understood his feelings, and was glad that they'd drifted apart as friends by that time. There would be no awkwardness to avoid while eating at McDonalds or playing Xbox, because they hadn't done that in months anyway.

As he approached the choir room, he could hear Kurt's voice raised in anger. I wasn't something he'd heard often this year, so it startled him. "How could you do this, Blaine?" Kurt shouted. Dave drew near the door, but didn't go in. He couldn't see anything, but he could hear perfectly.

"It's what's best for me, Kurt," said Blaine, obviously angry as well. "And I have to look out for that, because it's not like _you_ care much about it these days."

Dave heard Kurt suck in a breath. "I don't know what you're talking about!" he cried.

"Oh come on, Kurt!" Blaine replied peevishly. "Everything else comes before me, and it's been like that for weeks. PFLAG, Sandy, glee rehearsals…and of course, let's not forget about your _BFF,_ Dave."

"I never pegged you as one of those guys who would expect me to give up all my other interests for the boy I was dating," said Kurt defensively.

"I'm not, and you know it. But we've drifted apart, Kurt. We're boyfriends in name only, and have been for a long time. We go out to dinner, see movies, make out on your couch..." Blaine paused, and Dave winced at the mental image of him and Kurt kissing. "But we're just going through the motions. At first it was just you, but now I'm phoning it in just as much."

"Blaine," Kurt said, and Dave recognized the tone immediately. It was the Kurt Hummel _I'm-trying-not-to-cry-but -I'm-not-doing-such-a-great-job_-_of-it_ tone. Dave knew Kurt's eyes were welling up with tears, and he clenched his big hands, fighting the urge to go in and punch Blaine out for making Kurt cry.

"It's been getting harder and harder, to care about you. To love you. Because it's such a one-way street. You're…absent, Kurt. You tell me you love me, but there's nothing in your eyes that tells me it's remotely true anymore. I can't just keep giving and never getting anything back. I have too much respect for myself than that."

"You're breaking up with me?" cried Kurt. "On top of leaving McKinley, you're dumping me too?" Dave was stunned. Wait, what? Blaine was leaving the school, with only a couple of months left? And with Nationals in Vegas right around the corner?

"I should have done it before," admitted Blaine. "I kept thinking that something would change, that what we had before could come back. I'm sorry I have to do it all at once, whether you believe it or not."

"Fine!" said Kurt, rather spitefully. "I get that you don't want me anymore. Whatever, Blaine. But you can't do this to New Directions. We have Nationals in less than five weeks!"

"Goddamn it, Kurt!" Blaine shouted, and Dave once again fought to stay on the other side of the door. "Do you always have to be so fucking self-involved? This is bigger than Nationals, don't you get it? How often does an old video of a show choir go viral, and gain the attention of an actual agent in the music industry? Have you seen how many hits the Warbler's version of _Raise Your Glass_ has gotten on YouTube? It's bigger than _Friday_! We have fangirls, for chrissakes! Legions of them!"

"_We_?" said Kurt. "You're already back to saying 'we' when you talk about the Warblers? Nice loyalty there, Blaine."

"I told you, the agent said that me being on lead was a deal breaker. He wants us to tour malls across the Midwest over the summer. He's talking about a possible record deal, and recording original songs. We could be the next Justin Biber! And you want me to pass on that, Kurt? Really?"

There was a long, cold silence, then Kurt spoke. "Do what you have to do, Blaine. Screw us over, screw _me_ over, so you can be famous. Don't be surprised if they expect you to go back in the closet, though. I bet they won't want you to disappoint your _fangirls_."

Suddenly, Dave heard footsteps; but before he could move, Blaine was marching out of the choir room and nearly collided with him. He looked Dave up and down, glaring. "Well, if it isn't the second string," he said pithily. "He's all yours, big boy. Hope you know what you're signing on for."

Dave had never said anything rude to Blaine. He'd remained civil and polite no matter how much Dave had resented his relationship with Kurt, because he didn't want to cause tension. But it looked like Blaine and Kurt were over, so all bets were off. "Fuck off, Anderson," Dave said quietly.

"Oooh, witty," said Blaine sarcastically. "It's no wonder Kurt's so taken with you." He turned on his heel and strode away.

Dave waited a minute or so, then entered the choir room. Kurt was sitting at the piano with his head in his hands. "Kurt?" he said softly. "You okay?"

Kurt laughed bitterly, taking his hands off his face. "Not really," he said, unconsciously repeating Dave's words to him so long ago in this very room. "I suppose you heard all that?" he said, gesturing at the doorway.

"Some of it, yeah," said Dave, sitting next to Kurt on the bench. "I'm sorry. About him dumping you, and the club like that." He took Kurt's hand and held it, grateful for once to be able to comfort Kurt, instead of it forever being the other way around. "He's an asshole," Dave said.

"He has a point," admitted Kurt, scrubbing his free hand over his face. "Things haven't been good between us for a long time. But it's hard to let go of your first love, you know?"

"I know," said Dave. _God, do I. I sure don't know how I'll ever be able to let you go, Kurt_.

"I don't know what we're going to do," said Kurt. "We're _fucked_, Dave. Blaine's solo was so strong. I don't think there's anyone who can fill in for him, and do nearly as good of a job. Asshole or not." He choked out a despairing laugh.

They sat there silently for a few minutes, holding hands. Then Dave took a deep breath, and rose off the piano bench. Kurt had seen him dance, but he'd never heard him sing. No one had, not solo. But Dave could hear what it sounded like when he sang in the shower, or in his car, and he knew he was good. _Scratch that, thought Dave. I'm __**great**__. Way better than Finn or Sam or any of those guys. I might even be better than Blaine._

Kurt looked at him, questioningly. "Dave?"

Dave opened his mouth to say something, but what came out wasn't merely words. He sang, completely acapella, to Kurt.

_You, you got me thinking it'll be alright._

_You, you told me, "Come and take a look inside."_

_You believed me every single lie._

_But I, I failed you this time._

_And it feels like tonight, I can't believe I'm broken inside._

_Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do,_

_But try to make it up to you_

_And it feels like tonight…_

_Tonight_

Kurt was staring at him, an awed smile teasing the corners of those soft lips. Dave kept going, his voice getting stronger and stronger, peaking when he hit the bridge.

_I never felt like this before; just when I leave, I'm back for more_

_Nothing else here seems to matter_

_In these ever-changing days, you're the one thing that remains._

_I could stay like this forever…_

Kurt stood as Dave sang the final chorus. He took Dave's hands as he sang the last lines, looking deeply into his eyes.

_There's nothing that I wanna do,_

_But try to make it up to you_

_And it feels like tonight…_

_Tonight…_

Dave stopped singing. He cleared his throat, nervously. "I don't know if it's too late. But if it's not?" he said. "I'll join glee club. I think I can help you guys."

Kurt's face broke into a wide, open smile, and he threw his arms around Dave. "I'll say," he laughed, squeezing Dave's tightly. Kurt released him, but kept his arms slung around his neck. "How did you make it almost through the whole year, without me knowing what an incredible voice you have?"

Dave shrugged, blushing. "I'm kind of a ninja like that," he said.

"You're kind of something," said Kurt, looking at Dave fondly.

They stood there for a while, as the moment intensified. Dave felt his entire being pulled towards Kurt. He leaned forward, bringing their faces together. He paused, though. What if he was misreading Kurt's signals? He didn't want to upset the other boy, to do anything that would make him uncomfortable.

Kurt looked at Dave, and saw the hesitation in his eyes. There were sparks shooting through Kurt's veins, a kind of excitement and arousal he'd never experienced before. He licked his lips, staring at Dave's cute little bow-shaped mouth. "Do it," Kurt said, breathlessly. "It's okay, I want you to."

That was all it took. Dave took his hands off of Kurt's waist, cupping his cheeks instead. He brought their mouths together, and it was like Locker Room 2.0. A reboot, so to speak. The same thing but infinitely better, with both of them completely into it and no bad feelings tainting anything. They kissed passionately; even a little roughly. Dave turned Kurt around and pressed him up against the piano, thrusting his pelvis helplessly against Kurt's. Kurt whimpered, raising one foot off the floor and twining his calf around Dave's. He opened up his mouth, and their tongues slid against each other's, hot and wet.

Neither boy was sure how long they stood there, kissing and grinding against each other deliciously. But without warning, a barely muffled shriek sounded, freezing Kurt and Dave in place. "Oh, holy shit!" a female voice rang out. They detached their lips and looked over, only to see Sandy gaping at them from the doorway. Her hand was over her mouth. They all stood frozen for a moment, then Sandy took her hand away. "Sorry...oh, God, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. I'll just…" she gestured vaguely towards the hallway. "…go away. Like, far."

Dave felt Kurt's arms slip from around his neck, pulling away. Dave looked at him, flinching at the smaller boy's confused, uncomfortable expression. "No," said Kurt shakily. "You're not…we're not…" he lifted his eyes to Dave's, but they darted away almost immediately. "I gotta go." Kurt grabbed his messenger bag from the foot of the piano bench and fled the room, nearly knocking Sandy over in his obvious panic. Dave stared numbly at the doorway, blew out a breath, and sat down on the bench. He gazed at his feet, eventually hearing soft footsteps approach.

"Are you okay, David?" he heard Sandy ask, tentatively.

Dave shrugged, keeping his eyes on the floor.

"I really am sorry," Sandy said. "I was just so shocked, it kind of slipped out. I don't have much of a filter. I knew you and Kurt were close, but I didn't know you two were together. He never said anything."

Dave felt tears burn his eyes. God, why had he kissed Kurt? He'd ruined everything. "We're not," he mumbled.

"Could you say that again? I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you with your head down like that," Sandy said.

Dave brought his head up, knowing his eyes were bright with unshed tears, but not really caring. "We're not together, Sandy," he said miserably.

His mother looked completely confused. "But, the way you two were uh…going at it? If you're not together, what was that?"

"Hell if I know. A big fucking mistake on my part, I guess," said Dave. He didn't know why he was talking to Sandy. He just felt completely numb and gutted, like walking out on her or giving her the cold shoulder was just way too much effort.

"You like him," Sandy said. It wasn't a question.

Dave barked out a laugh. "Yeah," he said. "Just a little." He knuckled the tears from his eyes. "I'm in love with him. I'm such an idiot."

"Being in love with Kurt makes you an idiot?" Sandy said, as if she wasn't quite tracking the conversation.

"No. But expecting him to feel the same way about me does." He looked at Sandy, almost welcoming the sympathy in her eyes. _What the hell_, he thought. _Any port in a storm_. "Blaine just dumped Kurt, and told him he was leaving McKinley to re-join the Warblers." Sandy's eyes widened at the news, but she remained silent. "I wanted to make it better for him. I sang for him, and told him I'd join New Directions if it would help at Nationals."

"You can sing?" Sandy asked, sounding surprised.

"Like a fucking bird, not that many people know it. Just Dad, because he's heard me around the house. And Kurt." He gave Sandy a dry look. "And now you, I guess."

"Oh," replied Sandy, deciding to shut up before she said the wrong thing.

"Kurt was happy again. Grateful. He hugged me, but then I had to be a moron and turn it into something it wasn't."

"He didn't want you to kiss him?"

"He said…he said he wanted me to."

"I'm confused," said Sandy, shaking her head and trying to make sense out of what her son was telling her. "He said he wanted you to kiss him, and you somehow messed things up by doing just that?"

"He wasn't thinking straight. He was emotional, and I took advantage of that. I should have known he couldn't really feel the same about me as I do about him."

"I think he's crazy about you," said Sandy. "Just as much as you obviously are about him."

Dave looked at her disbelievingly, and scoffed. "Nice try. You already said you were shocked when you saw us."

"He talks about you all the time at rehearsals, and when we hang out. 'Dave this' and 'Dave that'… it's all I ever hear. 'Dave was so brave to come out in high school, even though he could have waited until college, or even later.' 'Dave's coming over to watch _All That Jazz_ tonight. Can you believe he's never seen it?' 'Did I tell you that Dave's actually agreed to go shopping with me? I can't wait to get him into something besides a frayed rugby shirt.' He thinks the sun rises and sets on you. I wasn't shocked about the _idea_ of you two kissing. I was just shocked that the two of you actually stopped pussyfooting around and finally got down to it."

Dave stared at Sandy. At first, he thought that she was just saying those things, maybe to get on his good side. But her tone was so matter-of-fact, he found himself believing her. Or at least, believing that she believed it. "Really?" he asked, in a rather small voice.

"Do you know how I knew you were gay, David?" Sandy said. "Before you came out at the meeting? Even though we hardly see each other?" She waited while Dave shook his head. "Because of how you looked at Kurt, whenever he was around. You look at him like he's personally responsible for the all light in the room, or the air that you breathe. You look at him like his very existence completes you." She paused, and then cautiously reached her hand towards her son's shoulder. When he didn't flinch or pull away, she rested just the tips on her fingers on it. "And David? He looks at you the same way. I don't know how you can't see it, but I imagine you're just not objective enough. He's never said anything to me about it; and even if he did, I wouldn't betray our friendship by telling you. But I think its okay for me to let you know what I see with my own eyes, and hear with my ears. I'm pretty sure he's in love with you too."

Dave shook his head again. "No way. He couldn't get away from me fast enough. Why would he do that, if he felt like that about me?"

"He might have been scared, or confused. Or just overwhelmed. People run for all sorts of reasons, David. Even from people they love." Dave and Sandy's eyes met, and suddenly she wasn't sure precisely who she was talking about anymore. She took her hand off Dave's shoulder, and turned away for a moment to gather herself. This was about her son, and the boy he loved. It had nothing to do with her, and for once in her life she was going to make sure that his needs came first. She cleared her throat, turning around. "Are you really going to join New Directions?" she asked.

Dave looked at her, surprised in the sudden change in topic. "Yeah, of course. I told Kurt I would, so I will."

"Does this mean…" Sandy said, choosing her words carefully, "that I'll have to stop coaching the glee club? Because it's right before Nationals, and we have a lot of work still to do. I think the kids would be pretty upset if I walked, especially on the heels of Blaine screwing off to Ugly Blazer Land at the last minute."

Dave frowned. "Why would you…" he trailed off, but then he caught on. "Oh. Because of you and me and…everything?"

Sandy nodded solemnly.

"I didn't think about it at all, to be honest," Dave said. "I guess it could be awkward. But I dunno…I think I can get over it. It's just five weeks. And like the PFLAG thing, it's important enough that I can deal." He sighed.

"That's…that's just amazing of you, David," Sandy said, gulping. "I promise not to push, not to expect anything. I swear."

Dave closed his eyes, and suddenly it all seemed like too much. Kurt and Blaine's fight, Dave's impromptu audition, the feel of Kurt's lips on his own, Sandy's discovery of them, Kurt fleeing from Dave like he'd done so often back when Dave had bullied him…he felt like the weight of the world was back on his shoulders, and he longed for the relief of just letting go. He coughed quietly, then opened his eyes to meet Sandy's gaze. "When I join, I want to tell them that you're my mother."

"What?" asked Sandy, her hand pressing to her sternum. Her eyes were as wide as pie plates.

"Like I said, it'll probably be awkward, and weird," Dave said. "I don't think I have it in me to try to pretend that you're just some stranger, a friend of a friend I happen to see at PFLAG meetings. If I tell them, they'll _know_ why it's awkward and weird, and not bug me about it." He ran his hand through his hair, sighing again. "I'm just so _tired_ of keeping secrets. It's exhausting. I'm out of the closet, and Kurt knows I want him now…so I guess that makes you my last big secret. I don't want you to be anymore. I'd rather just have it all out there, and let what happens happen."

"Okay," agreed Sandy. "And thank you, David. For letting me keep coaching glee. I think…" she broke off, blinking back tears as much as she could. "I think it means as much to me as it does to them. I know I can never redeem myself with you. I know it's too much to ask." Hazel eyes met each other. There was no denial or acceptance of his mother's words; Dave just looked at Sandy, listening silently. "But if I can stick around this time, and help guide some other kids to success, maybe I can make up just a tiny bit of my ocean of karmic debt.

"You're welcome," said Dave. His mouth twitched up in a tiny, unintentional smile. Sandy opened her mouth to say something else, but it wasn't her voice that he heard next.

"Dave?" Kurt's voice came from the doorway, sounding unsteady. Dave and Sandy turned in unison, gaping. Kurt was standing there, gripping the frame with one hand like he needed it to keep upright. He was pale; the hair near his face damp, as if he'd been splashing water on it. Dave hardly noticed those things though, because all he could do was stare helplessly into Kurt's green eyes - teary, beautiful, and holding so much remorse it hit Dave like a blow to the chest.

"I think I'm out of here," murmured Sandy. She brushed her hand over Dave's arm, then did the same to Kurt as she passed him and slipped down the hall.

"I'm so sorry, Dave," said Kurt. "So sorry I freaked out like that on you."

"S'okay," mumbles Dave, hunching his shoulders and averting his eyes.

"No, it's not," said Kurt, approaching Dave. "It wasn't okay for me to leave like that. To act like I didn't enjoy every minute of that kiss as much as you did." Dave's eyes shot up to his, widening. "I wanted it, just like I said. I wanted _you_." Kurt drew closer, taking Dave's hands in his. "I've wanted it to happen for a long time, I think. And when it did, and then ended so abruptly, I just…got cold feet for a minute. It was overwhelming, of top of the whole Blaine fiasco. I needed a little time to absorb, but I shouldn't have taken off like that." He brought Dave's fingers to his lips and kissed them tenderly. "I'm sorry," Kurt repeated. "Will you forgive me? Give me another chance?"

Dave felt his heart swell with love so strongly, he was afraid for a moment that it might burst in his chest. He brought his hand to the back of Kurt's head, and brought their mouths together, whimpering as he did so. Kurt released Dave's hands and brought his palms to cup the bigger boy's cheeks; returning the kiss with a shudder, and a quiet sob of relief. After a few sweet moments, Dave broke the kiss, but brought their foreheads to meet as they panted a little in the aftermath.

Finally, Dave answered Kurt's question. "Always," he said, his lips curving up in a happy smile.

"_**Tonight" is by Daughtry, from their self-titled CD. **_

_**Epilogue to follow soon! I have a crazy week coming up, but I'm hoping since it'll be a shorter chapter I can get it up no later than Thursday night. It takes place at Nationals in Vegas, and I'm kinda stoked to write it. XD You know reviews help with that, so please leave them if you can.**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**It's hard to believe that a few weeks ago, I thought this might just be a one-shot. And then people liked it, so I thought "Hey, maybe a 3-chapter deal." But seven chapters, and now an Epilogue later, this has turned into a full blown story, and one of my most favorite things I've written. In a way, I feel like it's a bit of a love letter to my own mom, who forgave the mother that abandoned her and her three siblings, and who has shown me time and time again the meaning of goodness, kindness, and letting go. And who, by doing so, gave me wonderful memories of my Grandma Dorothy; a woman who I discovered in my adulthood was just as complex and conflicted as I've tried to make my OC, Sandy Girard.**_

Sandy stood in the wings with Will and the New Directions, waiting for the cue that the judges were done and it was time to take the stage for the awards ceremony. The kids had all broken up into little sub-groupings, and she looked around to see which one her son was ensconced in. There was no surprise there; Dave was leaning against a large empty crate, his front pressed to Kurt's back and arms looped around his slender waist as they spoke to Rachel, Finn and Mercedes. She smiled, warmed as always at the sight of the two boys so obviously in love with each other.

It had been quite the whirlwind getting everything together with Blaine exiting and Dave coming in, not to mention the temporary drama of announcing to the kids that their dance coach of several months was actually Dave's long-lost mother. They'd been shocked to say the least.

"Sandy is Dave's mom?" asked Tina.

"Dave's mom is _fabulous_?" asked Mercedes.

"Dave's mom is a _MILF_?" asked Puck. At that, Dave had lunged towards Puck, but Kurt had yanked him back into his seat, murmuring softly. Lauren had swatted her boyfriend none too gently, and Sandy had shot Puck her best death glare.

But after a while, things had settled into place, and they got down to the business of re-strategizing for Nationals. Will had thought that maybe they should just toss everything they'd been working on out, and start over again. Sandy had had no problem voicing her unhappiness with that suggestion, and was surprised that the kids seemed to be used to that sort of thing in glee. For sure Blaine's solo had to be switched out, because his vocal range and tone was quite a bit different than Dave's. But there was no need to throw out the rest of their hard work because one thing had changed. Did Will think that any professional stage production would get anywhere if they just kept starting over from square one upon losing a cast member? So in the end, they kept everything the same, but Blaine's solo rendition of Hot Chelle Rae's _Tonite, Tonite_ was replaced with a duet between Dave and Santana doing _Falling Slowly_ by Once. It was a total departure; but to be honest, they thought it worked out better once again having a slow, emotional song followed by an upbeat one, instead of two up tempo songs back to back like they had originally planned. And as Kurt had joked, it wasn't as if this year they'd have to worry about the performance being derailed by a mid-duet, impromptu kiss.

So it had all worked itself out, and in a little more than a month they had all found themselves jetting off to Las Vegas for Nationals, which was being held in the MGM Grand hotel. It was even a little more exciting than going to New York, because Sandy had worked in Vegas off and on for years, and had tons of experience and contacts there. They saw the usual free Strip features like the Bellagio fountains, the Mirage volcano, and the Sirens pirate show at Treasure Island. But also some fun but lesser known inexpensive outings; like the belly dancers at the Marrakesh Morroccan restaurant, and the Second City comedy show featuring performers still in training (but still hilarious) at the Onyx Theatre. The biggest treat she'd been able to arrange was a behind-the-scenes tour of _Phantom of the Opera_ at the Venetian, with help from one of her friends who was a stage manager there. The kids had thought that the tour was all they were getting, but they had no idea. Though it had maxed out her credit card completely, Sandy had gotten the entire group orchestra seats to the actual show. She'd be paying it off for months, but it was totally worth it to see them all jumping up and down and freaking out as if they'd won the lottery. Kurt had hugged her so hard she thought her eyes might pop right out, after which he'd run over to Dave and thrown himself into his boyfriend's arms. Dave had peered over Kurt's shoulder at Sandy, catching her gaze. _Thank you_, he mouthed, smiling at her and returning Kurt's embrace.

The first round of the competition itself had gone off without a hitch, exactly as planned. They all navigated to the lobby afterwards to see if New Directions had placed top ten, only Sandy and Dave unscarred by the previous year's disappointment about not making it that far. Will forced his way up to the front, scanning the placard, then spun to the rest of them with a joyful expression. "We did it!" he shouted, pumping his fist in the air. After much screaming and congratulating, they had all retired to their rooms to rest for the final round. That performance had been even better than the first one, and Sandy was sure they had at least a decent shot at the title.

Suddenly, the backstage staff indicated that the judges were about to announce the top five groups. One by one they were called out, the fourth and next to final group being Vocal Adrenaline. Holding her breath, Sandy waited for the last name to be called. _Please God, please…they worked so hard_, she thought. _Please let them make it_.

"And our last group, in the running for winner of the National Show Choir Championship…" There was a pause, and then, "Newwwwww Directionsssssssss!"

Yelling and flailing, the McKinley High glee club made their way onto the stage. Looking around at the kids, and at Will, she knew that even if they didn't win the whole thing, just getting this far was more than they had ever expected. Will squeezed her hand, and she blinked back tears as the placements were revealed, one by one. She kept expecting to hear their name, but it never came. Finally…unbelievably, the only two groups left on stage were Vocal Adrenaline and New Directions.

"Ladies and gentlemen," the MC announced. "Your first runner up is…Vocal Adrenaline!" Equal measures of applause and gasps rang through the theater, and Sandy whirled around, meeting the shocked gazes of the glee club. "Your 2012 National Show Choir Champions are the New Directions of Lima, Ohio!"

They all ran into each other's arms; a mass of group hugging, crying and laughing. Their trophy was brought out, and they raised it high. Sandy caught sight of more than one blissful kiss between the members of glee. Finn and Rachel. Puck and Lauren. Brittany and Santana. And of course, Kurt and Dave. The curtain dropped, and Sandy slipped off to a quiet corner offstage. Bringing out her cell phone, she tapped an entry in her contacts.

"Sandy?" Paul's deep voice sounded through the tiny speaker.

"Yes, it's me," she responded. "They won. They won the whole freaking thing, Paul!" Tears leaked out of her eyes, streaming down.

"Really?", Paul responded, and Sandy could tell his elation was completely genuine.

"Yeah, they did. They were brilliant!" She paused for a moment. "I wish you could have seen it," Sandy said. "I wish you could have been here. They were amazing. _David_ was amazing."

"Not really surprised," responded Paul. "And I wish I could have been too. Tell David I'm so proud of him, and that I love him, will you?"

"Of course."

"Can you tell him something else?" Paul asked.

"Sure."

"A letter came from Columbia in New York City today," Paul said. "He said it was okay to open it while he was gone, if it came from there or Fordham. Tell him he got in, and with a partial sports scholarship."

Sandy looked over at Dave holding hands with Kurt, the sight becoming blurry as her tears overflowed once again. "I'll tell him," she sniffed. She heard her name called. "I have to go," she said. "I'll see you at the airport when you pick up David, okay?"

"Sure," said Paul. "See you then, Sandy."

She wiped her eyes, heading back towards the New Directions. She was immediately enveloped in hugs from all of the kids. Except one, of course. Her son stood slightly off to the side, smiling but with somewhat of an uncomfortable posture. When she was released, she walked over to him. "Congratulations, David," she said, making no move to touch him, or reach out physically in any way. "You were fantastic. I don't think they could have done it without you."

Dave got a funny look on his face, and suddenly, Kurt was at his side. He glanced at Kurt and smiled ruefully. "Thanks," he said. "You know, I think the same goes for you. I don't think we'd be standing here right now, if it wasn't for you." He shuffled his feet awkwardly, and Sandy wrung her hands together nervously.

Kurt rolled his eyes at both of them. "Seriously, guys?" he said. "Just hug each other and get it over with. I promise, the world won't implode or anything."

Sandy stood still, but after a moment or two, Dave drew closer. He reached out his hands, then withdrew them. Sandy was fairly sure that he was going to start backing away completely; when without warning Dave grabbed her shoulders and hugged her to him tightly, as if he was afraid he'd lose his nerve.

Sandy gasped , her arms going around her son for the first time since he was only six years old. It felt just as wonderful. _Scratch that_, she thought. _It's even more wonderful. Back then, he hugged you just because you happened to be his mother. This time, you've __**earned**__ his embrace, and his acceptance._ _About time you got your priorities straight, Sandra._ "I love you, David", she whispered into his ear.

Dave pushed her away from him gently, though he kept his hands on her shoulders. She could see that his eyes were as teary as her own. His mouth quirked up in a heart-wrenching, beautiful smile. "I know, Sandy," he said. "I know you do."

Sandy wanted to burst into loud sobs and throw herself back into her son's arms, but resisted. _This is about what he needs. What he's comfortable with. Don't push it, it's more than you ever thought you'd get. And it's way more than you deserve._ She smiled back at Dave. "I'm glad," she said, simply.

She felt a touch behind her, and realized that Kurt had come around to their sides, rubbing both of their backs gently. "So," he said. Kurt's tone was light, but his eyes glowed with love and pride for both of them. "You guys ready for the big group picture?"

"Absolutely," said Sandy and Dave, in perfect unison. They looked at each other, startled for a moment, then began laughing. They each took one of Kurt's hands, and made their way over to the rest of the group, grinning happily the whole way there.

_**Stick a fork in it, this fic is doooooooone! :D My everlasting and utmost thanks to all of you, for making the whole of this fic better than the sum of its parts. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}**_


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